Spacehost

I need to save this money for something useful and not, like, blow it all on mods for this '92 Supra.

Trying to play videogames with kids is the real Dark Souls.

I went completely off course and stopped trying to beat the first boss. So I fought some skeletons but I got tired of that because I’m not very good at skeletons. Then I fought a dragon and got tired of being cooked by that. Then I found some tunnels and I’m spelunking along with a flail trying to beat a sub boss. I am yet to be remotely bored or feel stuck.

I almost defeated the first boss a few times last night, but I've submitted to the idea that I need to just wallow in the summoning pool for a while, learning the patterns and when I can counter/ shield stun him for massive damage.

Is there any way I can pay to have the magazine injected into my brain instead of using my eyes to absorb it? I've got a teetering stack of them that implies I've not actually read an issue since 2020.

That Gran Turismo score is going to cause a mass riot.

I went for a wander in this and found I was thrilled. Completely thrilled. Could I avoid combat entirely and just shortcut by way to the end of the game?

HOW

Oh, it's not racing game fans they're targeting. It's people who own these sorts of cars in real life and leave them parked in immaculately polished garages.

Roy Kent is the best character on TV. I want him to turn up in Better Call Saul. I want him to show up floating about in The Expanse. Just give us more Roy Kent.

In less dire news, I finally won the used car ad lottery and found near enough my car from Gran Turismo 1.

Just to play devil's avocado for a minute, I know exactly the sort of player who would spend that without batting an eyelid, and they wouldn't want to buy the car if it wasn't out of easy purchasing of the average punter. The sort of player who was dropping £5k a month into CSR Racing during the launch period, and it was hard to spend that much. So while it's absolutely ridiculous in the context of a fantasy car game for most of us to take on the equivalent of a part-time job driving cars on a loop to afford these, I understand why they're doing it.

Man, I spent two hours walking about, got summoned to some furniture-based pocket universe, and ran away from an angry man on a horse. I have killed no bosses. I still have no fucking idea where the edge of this world is. 10/10

I feel like a bit of a dingbat, but what am I meant to be doing early-game? I still get stomped by giants, random horse guys, etc etc around the Gatehouse Ruins but I've got the not-bonfires up until the first boss opened up. The first boss just wrecks me right now though. Should I just explore, level up and Git Gud?

I think most of the problem is that it's presented as a roulette with equal odds when it's obvious after a couple of spins that there's a probability of getting the different prizes and cheaper ones are more likely to come up than a new car or whatever.

As it should be.

Hells yes. Venus, win a sweat Penis, peen is wet Bean us, bean a bet Sheen this, sheeny set

Way to strike while the iron's a dead horse.

I can't believe that'll ever happen. I think even a reboot is off the table now, it would be impossible to watch it and not be thinking of Resurrections the whole time, whispering in your ear about how stupid and lazy and shit having another Matrix movie is.

I kept doing that until I got a feel for the car. I'd just shout YEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAWWWW and wave my pad around my head like a lasso.

Yeah, I wound up whacking on the oversteer correction when I was doing the Yank landboat book. Just too easy to make them spin. I had it turned off to start with because I like making the cars slide around usually.

I keep dipping into this and having no clue what to do next, and still enjoying it immensely. I almost killed a giant on my Todd last night, which felt like progress. No joy on the first proper boss though, I may need to level up a little more.

Ahem https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7DE6YhLtRdERhONrn7z1RA?si=t6ZieBLdT9G5AHReuZZ9gQ&utm_source=copy-link

Wait what