Caleb Newcastle

Oh yeah. Putting Mario and co in 150cc karts with shells, bananas and lightning makes perfect sense.... Yeah I guess. But you find all kinds of crazy shit in the mushroom kingdom. Zelda's always kind of been medieval in feel so finding a 150cc turbo charged racing buggy outside hyrule castle would arguably make no sense. Yep quite right. She's got to go and fight with Samus Aran, Fox McCloud, and Pikachu on a Donkey Kong inspired level... Alright. Fine. Legend of Zelda Nitro Kart Bonanza. Tracks littered with loop the loops, neon lit tunnels and asteroid snagged tether cord vertical straights. And while you race around at 1000mph in your enhanced Epona Alpha Mach-tech racing Kart we'll play banging Techno at levels that'll make your ears bleed. Sorted.

Oh yeah. Putting Mario and co in 150cc karts with shells, bananas and lightning makes perfect sense.... Yeah I guess. But you find all kinds of crazy shit in the mushroom kingdom. Zelda's always kind of been medieval in feel so finding a 150cc turbo charged racing buggy outside hyrule castle would arguably make no sense.

Smash Bros. 8) Bollocks... Zelda Championship Bass Fishing! Tetra Pirate Beach Volleyball! Tetra-tis! (I'm clutching at straws here...)

(Puts hand up meekly) I'd buy that... Really? Hmm... OK but the karting idea makes no sense whatsoever. However if we put all the various characters on their horses we get Legend of Zelda Pro-Jockey Challenge! Ride to Victory! Win the Hyrule Cup! Which doesn't actually sound that bad now I've started fleshing the concept out. Bugger. Um. Zelda Tournament Fighters? That'd have to be shite, right?

Nah... what you really want is a multiplayer game loosely based on Zelda where you run round collecting stamps or some such shit. Or a Legend of Zelda karting game...

Hands Down! ...Card Devil Extreme: Last Resort Poker Sorry. I just like that. But 'Hands Down' works on many levels. ie two. Or three.

Card Devil Extreme: Last Resort Poker

Oh, just a quick plot related question: is Yuna still an absolute bint?

Maybe I'm missing something, but what's the difference between an Active Time Battle that's set to "wait" and the pure turn-based approach of FFX? I'd have thought nothing. Even though you can see your characters action bars filling it can be very difficult to judge which team member will act when. Similarly you have no idea when an enemy will attack. After nine or ten turns perhaps but in Square games that's often all the time your opponent needs to totally fuck your party up. X was clearer with its the chain of events menu making complex strategies a little easier. Even in wait ABS is designed to make you panic and I really hate that. Grandia 2 has a similar system to ABS but it informs you of all the combatants' status which gives you more leeway in your plan of action. Getting fucked up when you're not expecting it by an enemy ( as happens a fair bit in ABS) may be more realistic but frankly it's not much fun. Just my opinion, though.

Aye, but the battle system in X was nigh on perfect in my opinion, a fact that's demonstrated by it holding the dubious honour of being the only Final Fantasy title I've finished. Not to mention that even after its conclusion I went back and started hunting down Dark Aeons and legendary weapons. I appreciate being able to think ahead and plan when fighting some giant evil bitch of a monster. Even in wait mode that's really tricky with ABS. Started playing through a non-emulated version of FFVI on Saturday and by Mt Kolts I was ready to kick the screen in because of the fucking battles. Anyway. Rant over. Sorry.

But why did they reintroduce the active battle system? Why? I fucking hate the active battle system! Turn based! Turn based, you Squaresoft bastards!!!

The problem is the Xbox is too heavy and unwieldy to surreptitiously slip under your poncho in a fistful of dollars stylee. So there's obviously no useful purpose for this knowledge. Well except that if an xbox game ever pisses me off I'm going to need something better than a 9mm pistol to fuck my machine up. Like a pneumatic drill. Or a piledriver. Or KOTOR.

Yes. And make that one game Guilty Gear X. As someone said earlier it's sooooo different to SFII it should hit you from the outset. The speed, the game mechanics, the glorious hi-res character designs... the entire thing is just brimming with creamy fighting goodness. Also play against a human opponent. Always play against a human opponent. Victory is sweeter, defeat so much better. I tend to find 2d beat em ups in single player little more than practice for kicking my mates' asses.