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M.Night Shyamalan's The Happening


Goose
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So you don't think the initial sequence of suicides was well done? Most critics who hated the film at least agree that it starts quite promisingly.

I was just kidding - I did think the opening was interesting and showed some promise for what might have come. Unfortunately it fell apart soon after. I just had a quick look at what I wrote and I stick by it, some of the imagery was disturbing (especially the hanging people) but it was all for nought.

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The people who complain about this movie are the ones who hated Signs because of the water thing. It's okay, there's two types of people in this world, those who can enjoy themselves, and those who hate M Night Shyamalan films.

I saw Signs, I'm a science nerd, the water thing didn't bother me.

But it was so fucking dull I put my fist through the screen when Shayamalamamamamamamlamlamamamanananamananalanmamananan did his cameo.

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I don't understand how ANYONE CAN SAY THAT SIGNS WAS DULL.

I mean jesus fucking christ. Do you know what normal movies are like? You know, the sorts of films that adults see, 'drama' films and romance movies and that? I watched Far from Heaven a couple nights back. I should have loved it because it was a liberal wet dream but you know what? It was so slow and dull that I just could not be bothered. Most movies are like that. Slow and leisurely and rewarding if you can withstand it but dull if you can't.

Signs is like an MTV music video compared to those films. And that scene with Shyamalan, in the car, is fucking excellent. "I've trapped one of them in the pantry" ZOOMS OFF. That shit fucking rocks. The last 45 minutes of Signs is the tensest shit ever because you have no idea what the hell is gonna happen.

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Signs has a fair few good moments in it, the video of the alien waltzing past the entryway at that kid's party in South America had the hairs on my neck standing on end... The whole "everything is done for a reason" thing was kinda crap though.

That said, The Happening was funny but also so so bad, it had to be intentionally crap or maybe Shyamalananananana got bored a week into filming, only reason it could've turned out so bad.

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Signs has a fair few good moments in it, the video of the alien waltzing past the entryway at that kid's party in South America had the hairs on my neck standing on end... The whole "everything is done for a reason" thing was kinda crap though.

That said, The Happening was funny but also so so bad, it had to be intentionally crap or maybe Shyamalananananana got bored a week into filming, only reason it could've turned out so bad.

If he came out and said 'OK, you got me! The big twist is that the whole film is a piece of shit despite the amount of hype we attached to it, LOL' I'd doff my cap. I mean, they're running away from the bleedin' WIND!

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The bit in the show home is genuinely funny...but that's it. So are we to believe that Shamalam has created a situationist joke where he spent $57 million on a 'so bad it's...well, just bad' movie? Effectively ending his career in the process? He's got some chutzpah, I'll give him that!

And by the way, the stuff at the start is just shit, so the film does not 'start well'.

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Anyone else call the 'jeep into the tree' thing a few seconds beforehand and then laugh as the 2 blokes destroyed the windscreen with their faces as they flew through it?

How about the guy in the zoo cage who had his arm torn off with absolutely no resistance like it was held on with tissue paper?

Or the guy who ran himself over with the big sit on lawnmower?

Old lady 'killing' herself by headbutting the windows?

Film is lulz.

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  • 7 months later...

Decided to watch this on Sky Movies last night.

Unfortunately, they're showing the gore-free version, which probably removes the 'best' bits. Still, after all the terrible reviews, it was actually better than I expected - not good, but I liked the basic premise, even if it was handled pretty badly (how the hell did the plants manage to create wind?).

I liked how one death involve crashing a jeep at high speed into a tree, and another a lawnmower that cut down swathes of grass. LOL at the stupid plants. Right back atcha motherfuckers! :)

Also, I know

.

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I watched this a few days ago too.

I'm still waiting for the 'twist', surely it wasn't really plant revenge... was it?

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  • 2 years later...

It is the most amazing unintentional comedy. Fucking hilariously stupid. I'm recording it so I can show my lady. I'm sure she'll appreciate it.

I read this *just* after I burst into uncontrollable giggles.

This Zooey actress - is she usually this bad at acting? I mean, I've never seen Mark Wahlberg this bad so I'm assuming that she's normally pretty good, but it just makes no sense.

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