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Worst console you ever owned


Asura
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What was the worst console you ever owned? Did you ever hand over your hard-earned cash, only to be disappointed with poor build quality, lacklustre games, lying boxshots or awful controllers?

For me, it has to be the Game Boy Color. Probably a bit of a controversial choice, but I'll explain. I bought a Game boy Pocket in early 1997 whilst on holiday in Tenerife, and I was blown away by it. By that point, the Game Boy had been out for some time so the range of games was enormous. I had some brilliant games; RC Pro-Am, Zelda, Mortal Kombat 2... All sorts.

When the Game Boy Color was announced I was really excited; there was even a magazine specifically for the machine which I bought in anticipation. The games looked brilliant; Zelda DX, a Wario game of some description, Tetris DX... They looked brilliant with really vivid colours and pinsharp visuals.

Then, I exchanged my GB Pocket at a local Indie as a part-ex for a Game Boy Color shortly after it launched, and I was really disappointed. The screen was (and I insist on it until this day) drab and dull. The colours on the screens in the mags, presumably grabbed via some kind of emulator were amazing, but they were barely visible in some games - Zelda DX being a culprit, not looking really different enough to the original to merit a full-price re-release. Worse still, the battery life was shorter than the GB Pocket and standard Game Boy games didn't look as sharp on the screen (which may even have been smaller; I'm not totally sure).

The most damning thing though is that I don't think I ever played a "must-have" GBC game that didn't work on the normal Game Boy. The only GBC title I had that I liked was Street Fighter Alpha, but that was more a quid hidden in manure than a true diamond in the rough. Then of course there's the machine's success at the expense of the Neo Geo Pocket Color, a machine its superior in every way (opinions may vary :angry: ) and you have the worst machine I ever bought.

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Not sure...the Dreamcast's a pretty strong contender - being a poor student I bought it for £15 after it had died out and I eagerly began snapping up games at indie stores - initially it felt like a step-up from the PSOne I'd been enjoying, but eventually I realised that I was amassing an impressive collection of mediocre titles. Crazy Taxi felt too flimsy, Jet Set Radio felt too restrained, Space Channel 5 was alright for the first playthrough, Sega Rally 2 felt dated (although I loved the "game over yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah" soundbite), Sonic Adventure and its sequel would have been great if not for the huge amounts of filler... I think Soul Calibur and Virtua Tennis were the main standouts, and it wasn't until much later that I yarred classics such as Border Down and Under Defeat.

I mean, I'm not saying it's a disaster of a machine, but of the other consoles I've owned from that era (PSOne, Xbox 1, PS2) it definitely disappointed me more than the others...

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I have to say the PSP. Not because it has NO GAEMS but because being restricted by optical media on a handheld is such a pain. I've recently bought Chinatown Wars and Rock Band Unplugged and both have such...slow...loading...times that it often seems more trouble than it's worth to even load them up. I realise CFW is the answer but that's a bind to keep on top of as well, espicially if the only reason you want it is to run games from a Memory Stick.

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Has to be the Amiga CD32. I already had an A1200 and it seemed every game I got was the same game with some added fmv. Even then you could get the "rips" on disk for the standard Amiga. The controller was dire, and I'd end up plugging the standard joystick in to it. After getting the Ami-link kit and using it as a serial cd rom drive for my 1200 I couldn't tolerate the atrocious transfer rate so ended up just buying a CD Rom drive,which included the cd32 boot option as well, rendering the console completely redundant and doomed to gather dust till I sold it off cheap in the paper. I picked it up cheap but even that didn't save it from total neglect.

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I have to say the PSP. Not because it has NO GAEMS but because being restricted by optical media on a handheld is such a pain. I've recently bought Chinatown Wars and Rock Band Unplugged and both have such...slow...loading...times that it often seems more trouble than it's worth to even load them up. I realise CFW is the answer but that's a bind to keep on top of as well, espicially if the only reason you want it is to run games from a Memory Stick.

To be fair, you do have the option of installing some later games on the memory stick from the UMD, plus some games are available to download via the naff PSN store.

I would say the Atari Jaguar for me. I spent ages waiting for it, read all the hype, then like the complete mug I was, bought it at launch. Pretty much 99% of the games were utter toss.

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I have to say the PSP. Not because it has NO GAEMS but because being restricted by optical media on a handheld is such a pain. I've recently bought Chinatown Wars and Rock Band Unplugged and both have such...slow...loading...times that it often seems more trouble than it's worth to even load them up. I realise CFW is the answer but that's a bind to keep on top of as well, espicially if the only reason you want it is to run games from a Memory Stick.

CFW updates itself through the PSP online update section of the system. It's not a bind at all, once it's on it's good to go.

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Not sure...the Dreamcast's a pretty strong contender - being a poor student I bought it for £15 after it had died out and I eagerly began snapping up games at indie stores - initially it felt like a step-up from the PSOne I'd been enjoying, but eventually I realised that I was amassing an impressive collection of mediocre titles. Crazy Taxi felt too flimsy, Jet Set Radio felt too restrained, Space Channel 5 was alright for the first playthrough, Sega Rally 2 felt dated (although I loved the "game over yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah" soundbite), Sonic Adventure and its sequel would have been great if not for the huge amounts of filler... I think Soul Calibur and Virtua Tennis were the main standouts, and it wasn't until much later that I yarred classics such as Border Down and Under Defeat.

I mean, I'm not saying it's a disaster of a machine, but of the other consoles I've owned from that era (PSOne, Xbox 1, PS2) it definitely disappointed me more than the others...

I think I'd have to say the same (and it looks like I got mine at the same point in its lifespan). All the games I got hold of were a bit shoddy, whereas all the "classics" I'd heard were so great seemed to be impossible to get find at a decent price.

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Xbox for me, such a dodgy piece of hardware. Everything on it is either breaking or seized up or falling off. PS3 is prolly a close second - for the lack of exclusive games and/or graphics glitches like crap framerates and screen tearing.

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I love my Game.com. It's shit, but then I love shit. However, the PSP is shit and expects you to think it's great, whereas the Game.com is funny shit.

If you see what I mean.

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PS3 by miles and miles... I've had it nearly 3 years now, that's well enough time to decide it is a massive pile of sh**.

I already think of it as a curiosity, a failed retro console.

I've owned 3 of the fuckers now - easily my choice too - it's not like there's no games at all but if you own a 360 it's so far behind it's not funny.

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Tricky one, it's one of three:

Xbox - bought a Yod@ box for about £40 off someone on here and it got used solely as a way of playing films I'v yarr'd. Other than that, Forza and PGR got a few goes and that's it.

GC - got given one by my brother in law, with the intention of getting all the "must-haves". went through the list of "must-haves" and went "meh". I've never even plugged it in, it just doesn't interest me.

PS3 - I think this is the winner. Bought it for >£300 nearly two years ago, have bought half a dozen games for it, but all it's really been used for is a replacement for the Yod@ box

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Probably the PSP. Not because I don't think the machines a wonderful piece of kit (and still one of the most gorgeous looking machines), but because it's never had any games on it that I wanted to play. I always thought the idea of a PS2-esque handheld would be a brilliant thing, but the reality is that the games I love work best when I'm sat down and playing on a big screen. It never seemed to translate to the (admittedly lovely) screen of the PSP!

Not even a missed opportunity, it just never worked for me!

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My handheld vote goes to the GameBoy Advance. I got mine on import a few months before the UK launch and was stunned at just how difficult it was to see anything on the screen. If you didn't have light shining directly on the screen you may as well not bother.

My machine-hooked-up-to-the-tv vote goes to the Nintendo Wii. It's the only Nintendo console I've sold. I bought this on launch day, and even getting it chipped couldn't persuade me not to part with it. Shocking picture output on HD TVs, few must have titles and masses of shovelware that even gave the PS1 a run for its money meant I sold it after a year of very little use.

It does seem that amongst the mire of rubbish out for the system it does now play host to some nice titles. However, until Nintendo release a version that doesn't output in N64-o-vision on an HDTV I won't be getting another one.

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Toughie.

Sega Mega CD - its a toughie because i did actually like a few games - Sonic CD, Road Avenger and Night Trap. Most the other games where complete crap and i wouldnt touch night trap nowadays.

Xbox - bought a second hand one with a few games. Besides playing PGR2 online for several hours, I didn't play much else on it.

PSP - i just got bored of it after a while, although its still a nice machine to go back to every so often..

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Original GBA, without shadow of a doubt. Barely viewable screen meant playing anything on it a chore of trying to get the light just right. Bah!

Followed by my PS2 - mainly because of the lack of games and I was totally underwhelmed.

Of all the things to knock the PS2 for, a 'lack of games' seems almost absurd.

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The most damning thing though is that I don't think I ever played a "must-have" GBC game that didn't work on the normal Game Boy.

Zelda OoA and OoS couldn't be played on a normal GB!

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I've generally avoided owning any console I thought would be an unsatisfactory purchase so the list is luckily fairly short, but of the ones I have owned, the awards for most disappointing:

Portable:

Gameboy I suppose, but if I'd decided to buy a GameGear then that would probably pip it for that award, sold it after a few months use.

Home:

GameCube, software situation on this made me think that owning an N64 wouldn't have been that bad in comparison, without Capcom Shinji Mikami (and the exception of the only new Nintendo game, Pikmin), this would have been a doorstop in all but name.

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Disragarding retro consoles I've bought for pennies just out of curiosity (hello 3D0), probably the most disappointing 'new' console that I bought at full price would be the original GBA, for the reason most people would state: the terrible unlit screen. I bought the machine with Castlevania (probably the worst choice in that regard) and I remember playing it during breaks at work, angling it at the canteen window and still being mostly unable to see anything. I didn't have it for long.

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So, you missed out on Super Mario Deluxe. Shame on you.

That was a conversion of a game I'd already played to death years ago though.

Zelda OoA and OoS couldn't be played on a normal GB!
This I'll concede though, on the basis that although I didn't really want to play them, they were critically well-received.

A few people here have said the GBA, which ranks highly in this category for me due to its murky screen. I'm inclined to stick with the GBC though because despite that problem, the Advance had a wealth of terrific games, whereas I'm still not convinced about the Color.

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More than I initially thought, I think.

32X - not even Star Wars Arcade could've saved it from being spectacularly mediocre. It was just...balls.

PSP - I've had 2 or 3 PSP's, all CFW'd and I've prolly spent more time on the bog this week than I have playing them over the time I've owned a PSP. Forgoing the abysmal loading times when playing legitimately the design of the fucking thing is borderline abysmal and claw-hand inducing, the games woefully uninspiring (unless you like JRPG's and PS2 ports/cut down sequels) and the fucking thing discharges battery like you wouldn't believe. Add to that the emulation for Megadrive and the rest (one of the main reasons to get CFW) isn't anywhere near up to scratch makes it a paperweight more than anything else.

I mean, yeah, you can play PS1 games on it but, well, why would I these days? I've bought Rock Band Unplugged for £7.98 today in a vain attempt to use it. The only reason I don't sell it is because it's battered and is worth the square route of fuck all.

Wii - I have a love/hate thing with the Wii. Again onto my third one, mainly for Tatsunoko Vs Capcom and because I paid very little for it, I just find it to be a woefully uninspired machine with few games that I actually have any interest in. All the games I like to play on it use the Classic or Gamecube controller (indeed, I've had more use out of it as a Gamecube than a Wii). The only one I've persevered with with the dreaded waggle is Mario Galaxy, and then I got bored after 43 stars.

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