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Marvel's Eternals


JohnC
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I now have a new appreciation for the friends who I've made sit through ludicrously long credits for a scene that means the square root of fuck all to them.

 

Me watching the mid-credits scene:

 

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Me watching the after credits scene.

 

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Watched this last night. Had very low expectations as everyone says its shite. 

 

I thought it was ok, i wasnt bored at any point like others have said. Certainly had a lot of interesting aspects and some cool action scenes but also some fucking baffling ones as well. And the inconsistencies with the groups powers had me shouting at the TV. 

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I quite enjoyed this. :ph34r:

 

Probably something to do with my astonishingly low expectations and zero understanding of what is Eternal.

 

I'm giving it 5 solitary tear rolls out of 10.

 

Its certainly in the low end of the marvel scale mind.

 

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I thought this was a solid mid tier marvel.  I liked the first hour a lot but got somewhat less interested as it went on. Far too convoluted a plot and, as others have said, far too many Eternals. I as expecting the plot twist as my only exposure to the characters is the Gaiman story. 
 

I thought Colman was excellent and am somewhat surprised at the reaction to her performance in this thread. I was also happy that Jolie didn’t try to hijack the film and was quite happy to be a secondary character. 
 

3/5 from me, but that might go up with a rewatch. 
 

edit. I enjoyed it a heck of a lot more than Nomadland. 

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13 hours ago, Harsin said:

I now have a new appreciation for the friends who I've made sit through ludicrously long credits for a scene that means the square root of fuck all to them.

 

Me watching the mid-credits scene:

 

spacer.png

 

 

I had to read the wiki page and go "ohhhh" over some obscure hero that hasn't been introduced yet

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I thought that this might have been unfairly treated by reviewers so was looking forward to watching it.

I don't think I've cared less about a bunch of characters in my life, it's pretty much completely devoid of emotion and peril.

 

I almost turned it off part way through, never felt the need with an MCU film before.

 

The two leads (Ikaris and Sersi) were so dull, Ikaris especially who spent most of the film looking like he should have been in an ITV drama set in a small town.

I don't think anyone would use the word "chemistry" when describing them.

 

The supporting Eternals might have made a good film; Gilgamesh, Makkari and Phastos (plus Druig towards the end of the film although he annoyed me in the first half) should have had more time to shine.

 

There's an awful lot of staring into space while trying to be profound or earnest. It really reminded me of Star Trek: Discovery.

 

In short, high budget nonsense with a complete lack of charm or coherence.

A generous 0.5/5 from me, I can't even see myself staying up watching it in bed when it's on Film 4.

 

edit - I couldn't decide if the text at the end of the film that said "The Eternals Will Return" was meant as a promise or a threat.

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...well.  It didn't earn the weight or portent it sought to convey at the end.

 

At times it felt like an episode of the Umbrella Academy, which isn't a charitable thing to say.

 

The leads are hit and miss, the performances in isolation are fine, but they don't gel collectively. Coleman is probably at her best when she's with Jon Snnnnerrr.

 

The main problem is that despite having thousands of years of back story, and what feels like thousands of hours of run time, the characters don't really have enough time to make you care about them.  And they all love each other.

 

I also fell asleep and had to rewind it.

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Sprite! Hey Sprite, it's been 7000 years, how are you Sprite, you're a little kid, Sprite!

 

I was weirded out by how they kept saying their names over and over.

 

Absolute shite.

 

 

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I think this speaks to how bored of the 'normal' Marvel formula I am, because I enjoyed this a hell of a lot more than Spider-Man the other week.


I thought it had a bit of heart, too (not from Ikarus, I thought he was a bit of a plank) and considering there was very little action in it, I didn't feel it dragged - I suppose because this angle is a bit fresh, relatively speaking.

 

Some spoilered thoughts:

Spoiler

My only real complaint isn't actually even about this film as such - it's about the wider Marvel universe. Having seen Spider-Man first, I'm actually stunned that such a massive event (and more importantly, the aftermath) doesn't even get a Peter Parker quip. Whilst you can forgive the usual "Why didn't the Avengers help?" in these films, completely ignoring such a massive thing actually has made me think Marvel is a lot less smart about this stuff than I did before. It has almost broken some of the magic of the linked films for me (will it even be mentioned by anybody, ever, or seen again?)

 

Anyway, I thought the reason for not interfering with Thanos was a bit weak, but it is what it is (and is forgiven, just like the aforementioned "Why don't the Avengers help" in every film.)

 

On the positives, I thought this had some heart - not from Ikaris, I thought he was pretty wooden - and some humour (mainly via Karun) and the large cast didn't feel overstuffed - though of course individual development suffered for it. But the story was easy to follow and didn't rely on call-backs to other films, nor really any knowledge of the Celestials (which is handy, because I knew nothing about them.)

 

When there was some action, it was all decent enough - I certainly didn't feel drained by it like I have in many of the other recent Marvel efforts (both TV and film).

 

So yeah, all in all, I really quite enjoyed it - even with Mr Styles popping up with lord-knows what accent. :lol: 

 

Ultimately I think this proved, for me, that a change really is as good as a rest.

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4 hours ago, sandman said:

I thought this was a solid mid tier marvel.  I liked the first hour a lot but got somewhat less interested as it went on. Far too convoluted a plot and, as others have said, far too many Eternals. I as expecting the plot twist as my only exposure to the characters is the Gaiman story. 
 

I thought Colman was excellent and am somewhat surprised at the reaction to her performance in this thread. I was also happy that Jolie didn’t try to hijack the film and was quite happy to be a secondary character. 
 

3/5 from me, but that might go up with a rewatch. 
 

edit. I enjoyed it a heck of a lot more than Nomadland. 

 

2 hours ago, Bucky said:

...well.  It didn't earn the weight or portent it sought to convey at the end.

 

At times it felt like an episode of the Umbrella Academy, which isn't a charitable thing to say.

 

The leads are hit and miss, the performances in isolation are fine, but they don't gel collectively. Coleman is probably at her best when she's with Jon Snnnnerrr.

 

The main problem is that despite having thousands of years of back story, and what feels like thousands of hours of run time, the characters don't really have enough time to make you care about them.  And they all love each other.

 

I also fell asleep and had to rewind it.

 

Who the heck is Coleman?

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Would have worked better as a series. Then we’d have had the time to care about people like Sprite. Instead of having it artificially jammed down our throats via all the fucking kid jokes. Stupid. 

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5 hours ago, Gabe said:

 

  Hide contents

My only real complaint isn't actually even about this film as such - it's about the wider Marvel universe. Having seen Spider-Man first, I'm actually stunned that such a massive event (and more importantly, the aftermath) doesn't even get a Peter Parker quip. Whilst you can forgive the usual "Why didn't the Avengers help?" in these films, completely ignoring such a massive thing actually has made me think Marvel is a lot less smart about this stuff than I did before. It has almost broken some of the magic of the linked films for me (will it even be mentioned by anybody, ever, or seen again?)

 

Spoiler

I think it's set slightly after No Way Home.

 

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This was average at best, in its current state.  There is a good film there but it needs some serious trimming to the runtime. First MCU film that I’m pretty sure I won’t watch again.  Shame as the Celestial stuff was interesting.  Hated the design of the ship though, it’s scale kept changing and it just looked boring, like a giant flying Quality Street chocolate triangle.

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Watched this on Disney+. The IMAX presentation is deeply distracting, it changes aspect ratio constantly - not just between scenes but often from one camera cut to the next then back again. Just pick what you want your movie to look like, and stick with it. 
 

Also it’s really fucking dark. In a pitch black room it was still really a flat and subdued picture. I actually had to adjust my TV settings (which are fine for literally everything else) to see what was happening in some scenes. 
 

Also the film was shit. 

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1 hour ago, Ivanho said:

This was average at best, in its current state.  There is a good film there but it needs some serious trimming to the runtime. First MCU film that I’m pretty sure I won’t watch again.  Shame as the Celestial stuff was interesting.  Hated the design of the ship though, it’s scale kept changing and it just looked boring, like a giant flying Quality Street chocolate triangle.

But they are delicious, so that automatically means the ship design was fantastic!

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8 hours ago, Garwoofoo said:

Watched this on Disney+. The IMAX presentation is deeply distracting, it changes aspect ratio constantly - not just between scenes but often from one camera cut to the next then back again. Just pick what you want your movie to look like, and stick with it. 
 

Also it’s really fucking dark. In a pitch black room it was still really a flat and subdued picture. I actually had to adjust my TV settings (which are fine for literally everything else) to see what was happening in some scenes. 
 

Also the film was shit. 


it is very dark. I don’t find the imax stuff distracting though on an OLED - can’t work out why.

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10 hours ago, Garwoofoo said:

The IMAX presentation is deeply distracting, it changes aspect ratio constantly - not just between scenes but often from one camera cut to the next then back again. Just pick what you want your movie to look like, and stick with it. 

I don't find it distracting but you can choose to not watch the IMAX enhanced version if you want.

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On reflection, the main problem with this was that it was just a bit boring, and that is unforgivable for a Marvel film.  And the IMAX stuff was so unnoticeable that I didn’t even realise when the ratio changed.


Its not dampened my enthusiasm for the MCU, I just won’t watch this one again.

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