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Jug McKenzie

Star Wars Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker (December 2019)

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1 minute ago, Mr Combo Breaker said:

 

it's utterly destroyed the victory of the original trilogy. Everyone goes from heros to fat sacks of crap who have comprehensivly fucked everything up.

 

Luke Skywalker = crap teacher, almost murderer, ran away like a bitch

Leia = crap mum, didn't run away like a bitch but let the new senate fuck everything up. 

Han = crap dad, crap husband, ran away like a bitch

 

To be fair in TFA you don't know that about Luke. He's just mysterious (almost revered?) and missing/hidden

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I know it's been said countless time now but.. they should have just 'adapted' (actors ages yada yada) Zahn's trilogy. It was a great storyline with memorable characters and a cohesive world continuation.

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I imagine it would have been hard to attract A-list directors to the project if you told them they wouldn't be allowed to use their own ideas, and would instead be adapting a Star Wars tie-in book from 1991.

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I'm not sure where I read or saw it (and maybe it's in the comics/ tv shows) but having the first order start because the rebellion couldn't handle all of the galaxy wide difficulties and factions that the empire used big pyew pyew weapons to sort out could have easily worked. Having the empire be the "rebels" to begin with in some respects.

 

Or even make the first order rise up out of chancers, crooks and bounty hunters that used all the turmoil from the empire being defeated to set up their own little fiefdoms and then before they knew it, they were being jedi mind tricked by kylo to all do the work of the first order and make starkiller  ( although ideally I wouldn't have had another death star at all). You could have even used this to give a bit more to han, kylo, Leia and Luke - han could have inadvertently joined what turned out to be the first order as he heard of some great smuggling deal or what have you. 

What am i saying, Rathtars were a much better character developing and exciting sequence :hmm:

 

Instead to get every one back on board they did it pretty much as a soft reboot but also with the old characters and pretended it followed from the OT.

 

I'm just writing fan fiction now though so I'll shush.

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I'm wonder how badly JJ will mishandle distance in this film.  TFA (and Into Darkness) were both really bad.  Maybe someone shooting at someone on the ground from space?  Watching out of a window and seeing ships hyperspace from one star system and arrive in another?

 

 

 

 

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47 minutes ago, monkeydog said:

I'm wonder how badly JJ will mishandle distance in this film.  TFA (and Into Darkness) were both really bad.  Maybe someone shooting at someone on the ground from space?  Watching out of a window and seeing ships hyperspace from one star system and arrive in another?

 

 

 

 

 

And Trek 2009. His grasp of distance and basic high school physics is worse than Lucas' was in 1977.

 

And the the huge amount of staffing on these things. Surely somebody would have the guts to put their hand up?

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4 hours ago, Mr Combo Breaker said:

 

vader_NOOOO.jpg

 

Not a big fan of these latest films, but for all those people banging on about bringing Lucas back, see above and remember.

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No don’t! They’re really not very good! The first one especially is very poor, the others much better but overall they’re not great.

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1 hour ago, Steven said:

 

Not a big fan of these latest films, but for all those people banging on about bringing Lucas back, see above and remember.

Why is Vader surrounded by jizz explosions?  Palpatine look like he has something to do with it.

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20 hours ago, Sarlaccfood said:


I wish that this time round the Empire were the scrappy rebels. Using old Star Destroyers and patched-up TIE’s they’ve got hold of.


You’d still have the iconography of the classic movies, but this time they’re the desperate underdogs, using guerrilla tactics and an extremist ideology to go with it. 


I’d go one step further. Have our protagonists be part of a smaller imperial remnant that wants to bring back the glory of an empire they don’t understand, fighting against a republic that’s become corrupt since ROTJ.

 

11 hours ago, Sixkiller said:

No need to wait at all - it has been pretty comprehensively explained over the last 4 years using  a combination of books (the aftermath trilogy, Bloodlines) and the Battlefront 2 single player campaign.  There's very little that we don't know now about the First Order's origins.  The biggest question is how Snoke came to be in charge, as he wasn't when those who started the First Order headed off into the Unknown Regions, but even that is fairly obvious now reading between the lines of everything we know.

 

Ultimately, how they came to be was not vital to the story of the trilogy, just as how the empire came to be was not vital to the story of the OT.  But the explanations are all there, and have mostly been there for some time.


What’s the best Star Wars wiki to read up on this stuff?

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34 minutes ago, monkeydog said:

Why is Vader surrounded by jizz explosions?  Palpatine look like he has something to do with it.

 

I think he was having Padme over and Palpatine's gone and jizzed all over his bedroom again. He looks quite chuffed with the reaction he's got.

 

If you look closely, there seems to be some sort of cybernetic wanking device over Palp's right shoulder.

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Anyone else book tickets with Picturehouse Central for the 19th? I booked on the day they went on sale but yesterday they emailed to say the showing had to be moved to other screens for “operational reasons”. Basically moved from Screen 1 to Screen 5, which is significantly smaller. Fuck that. Went for the refund they offered.
 

Annoying but oh well. 

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35 minutes ago, 11 Herbs 'n' Spices said:

Anyone else book tickets with Picturehouse Central for the 19th? I booked on the day they went on sale but yesterday they emailed to say the showing had to be moved to other screens for “operational reasons”. Basically moved from Screen 1 to Screen 5, which is significantly smaller. Fuck that. Went for the refund they offered.
 

Annoying but oh well. 

 

That is Master-Anakin-there's-too-many-of-them-what-are-we-going-to-do on the annoying scale. Does the Odeon Luxe in Leicester Square have seats available? Done that a couple of times. It's pricey but them seats are niiiiice. Avoid the Haymarket Luxe though, it's a little pokey and more suited to films less reliant on spectacle.

 

Booked tickets in the UAE for Thursday 19th, 9pm, so 5pm UK time. Means not having to avoid the entire internet for too long. Suspect a fair few trolls will be out hoping to spoil others' fun so social media and YouTube with its reaction videos will be no-go areas (although I am looking forward to the Half in the Bag review). Good luck out there everyone!

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17 hours ago, Darren said:

No don’t! They’re really not very good! The first one especially is very poor, the others much better but overall they’re not great.


Ok, I’ll just read the Wikipedia pages to catch up on the story. Thanks for adding many hours to my life. :D
 

Actually, I wonder what the brief is for Star Wars movies? It seems to be, leave gaps at points A, D and F which we will fill in, have already been filled in, with multimedia product; books, comics and videogames. Now that would make a lot more sense as to the peculiar free-form state of the narrative. Although I can’t imagine the pennies that roll in from the expanded universe bring in a huge amount.

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Nah, there's no way they deliberately leave gaps. The sparse backstory for TFA was probably just to tighten up the script and keep it action-packed. A load of lore and backstory exposition would've killed the pace.

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50 minutes ago, Pob said:

Nah, there's no way they deliberately leave gaps. The sparse backstory for TFA was probably just to tighten up the script and keep it action-packed. A load of lore and backstory exposition would've killed the pace.


You don’t need any of that though, just a brief sentence in the opening crawl would suffice.


No way do I want endless exposition, just some very basic context to help with continuity.

 

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Quote

Luke Skywalker has vanished. 
In his absence, the sinister 
FIRST ORDER has risen 
from the ashes of the Empire 


That seems to cover it. Not sure how much additional detail they could have realistically provided here. 

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36 minutes ago, K said:

That seems to cover it. Not sure how much additional detail they could have realistically provided here. 


I guess it does. Maybe it’s not explanation of their rise that was needed but of how a moaning emo, comedy side-kick ginger and wannabe Emperor who gets sliced up like a pizza got so powerful in the first place. Likewise a shame their all powerful Star Killer Base basically has an enormous target on it that says “shoot here”. No plans or ventilation port precision needed here.

 

If the Empire were Nazis, the First Order are Nazis from Allo Allo.

 

Anyway, I have enjoyed both movies despite their flaws and look forward to the next one. I also look forward to JJ Abrams disappearing into his Outer Rim and a new more powerful order taking the helm.

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1 hour ago, K said:


That seems to cover it. Not sure how much additional detail they could have realistically provided here. 


But I wanted to know where Snoke came from!

 

etc

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2 hours ago, K said:


That seems to cover it. Not sure how much additional detail they could have realistically provided here. 

Maybe something about post-war tax hikes?

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