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Elden Ring - chortlesome japes


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I should probably not progress through this game in a semi-drunken state, especially given the scale of it all. 
 

I was just jolly cooping in the hosts NG+ Stormveil Castle, and i had absolutely no idea where to go. Not only because it’s 100+ hours ago on my playthrough and I’ve seen a lot of castles, but my memory is fucking terrible anyway. 😂

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I discovered the Belfries in Liurnia today.

Spoiler

I already had one of the blue swordstone jobbies from elsewhere (god knows where) and there's another in a chest in one of the belfries. So of course I used them. Everlasting Nightsky sounded interesting 

Spoiler

Nocktis, The Eternal City, or something like that. Oooh, I recognise this, it's on the other side of that big gap in the area where you have to light the 8 fires. Now I can go ant talk to the little guy I saw on the end of that raised path! Oh. One of you. And you do a new move, was not expecting that! And you don't get anything for killing him. Oh, do you mean to tell me that in the Eternal City proper, they are just standard mobs? Looking forward to going there....

 

Then I liked the sound of Crumbling Lands

Spoiler

Faram Azula, The Crumbling City. Fucking. Hell. The visual design here is astonishing. From have outdone themselves. And now it seems the boss from the very first cave I went into back in Limgrave are standard enemies here. No problem. Lol. Then I saw where I was on the map compared to where I've already uncovered. Haha. Every time I think this game is big, I end up getting teleported waaaaaaay over there. I can almost feel Miyazaki patting me on the head and saying "you have much to learn, young one". I'm like 75 hours in and I keep being astonished at the sheer scale of this thing. Where the hell do From go from here?

 

 

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16 minutes ago, HarryBizzle said:

Do these direction markers between bonfires ever disappear?:

 

ji1DucR.jpg

 

I assumed these ones (Castle Morne) were pointing to Leonine Misbegotten, but I killed him and they’re still there. 


No, they don’t. It’s something that threw me off a bit because I thought I still had stuff to do at certain locations. They just point you from Grace Point to Grace Point along the main game line.

 

After getting frustrated with some of the janky battles, I’ve headed off exploring again. Made my way through Sorcery Town, found a waypoint to a mini-dungeon on the other side. Whilst finding my way to that I found a poisonous bat shack. Fucking horrible place. Pitch black, poison blowing on the breeze, and bat after bat lying in wait. Ended up dying a lot to the point I was able to level up a bit more. Then found an item by chance that’s got me well excited for my next session! 😀

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20 minutes ago, Curtis said:

I should probably not progress through this game in a semi-drunken state, especially given the scale of it all. 
 

I was just jolly cooping in the hosts NG+ Stormveil Castle, and i had absolutely no idea where to go. Not only because it’s 100+ hours ago on my playthrough and I’ve seen a lot of castles, but my memory is fucking terrible anyway. 😂

Have you stopped levelling now

 

I’m 150 now, running around Bitches area, although not got to her yet

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31 minutes ago, Klatrymadon said:

Unless

  Reveal hidden contents

Godskin Apostle

is an outlier I seem to have screwed my damage output with a respec that barely altered my str. Rock Sling and Gravity Well seemed to be doing beefy damage to some minor overworld enemies (it was an int/fai-oriented respec, so that I could use more spells) but they barely scrape him. I'm using the same +15 Morning Star as before, so I wasn't expecting much of a drop, but I'm getting scared now. I was battering him down to 10% health in no time before, whereas now I can only shave off about 30% with a similar number of hits - gulp!

 

I don't have another Larval Tear, either... :(

 

 

A lot of the stuff in North Caelid is bizarrely high level I've found....

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Finished. 10/10 game of the year etc.

 

Final boss thoughts:

 

Spoiler

Radagon was good but the Elden beast was utter shite. Just swimming off and spamming AOE shit from a mile away. Tonnes of attacks that hit so many times over such a wide range that I was just drinking Estus to tank them because dodging seemed pointless. 


LOVED the last few areas.

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3 hours ago, disperse and recoagulate said:

At waypoint ruins a message said to look up, and a kind ghostly soul was pointing up. Lo and behold there’s an item on a wall. I tried for about 10 minutes jumping off the main structure onto the wall to collect it but couldn’t do it. Anyone know what it is?


I’m 99% sure it’s just a Trina’s Lily. Someone helpfully left a message at the exact point to walk off the edge when I got there.

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Right so I've thoroughly rinsed Liurnia now, along with Limgrave.  Still only have half the medallion thingy for the big lift at the northernmost part of Liurnia.  Had a look around for a sneaky bypass but couldn't find one. 

 

I guess I'm finally going to have to face my fears and go to Caelid. 

 

Those fucking birds man.  *shudder*

 

Off I go!!

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Just now, Triple A said:

I went to Altus instead which I think is easier/‘critical path’?

I don't know how. Don't tell me either though, I've clearly missed something. 

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1 hour ago, Ste Pickford said:

I keep having a pop at the Tree Sentinel from the start, and I still can't finish him off.  The big problem I have with trying to fight on horseback is that I keep jumping off.  I get tense during a fight and end up pressing the joystick in by accident and jumping off the horse when I don't want to.

 

I did him on foot with the wolves to help, I found it too annoying trying to hit him on the horse, he moves around too fast. I also have the same problem with joystick clicking, I end up crouching by accident at terrible moments in boss battles and sneaking right into a huge axe or whatever. 

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I too did him on foot, easier to time rolls imo.

 

Anyway, last couple of remaining nooks located and cleared out in the castle. Also found a couple of minibosses that wouldve been full bosses in previous souls games.

Beat the fuck out of the first and ran the fuck away from the latter

Spoiler

pretty sure I saw the corpse of cthulu on the way out, so I dont fancy my chances,

 

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2 hours ago, Ste Pickford said:

I keep having a pop at the Tree Sentinel from the start, and I still can't finish him off.  The big problem I have with trying to fight on horseback is that I keep jumping off.  I get tense during a fight and end up pressing the joystick in by accident and jumping off the horse when I don't want to.

I did him on foot. Summoned wolves to keep him busy. I can’t fight on horseback at all. I can’t time the slashes right.

 

edit: already been said!

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I did Tree Sentinel on Torrent but I waited several levels before I took him on. I've become quite proficient at the charged attack drive-bys, it starts to feel a bit cheesy at times.

 

I've clocked over 100 hours now and I'm level 99, I've no idea how anybody could get to 163 so fast. I die a lot I guess? I have a broadsword +20 and the north is kicking my butt.

 

The boss in the volcano area...

Spoiler

aahahAHAHahahAhaha...I can't see that happening ever.

 

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Ffs. Smashing up a room with an NPC in it is a stupid thing to do. Need to go farm runes to be able to afford to fix it before I can continue the quest line I’m on. 
 

Edit;

Managed to find ONE. 

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97 hours played, level 48. Not attempted the 2nd Main Quest Boss yet. There's just so much else to do!

 

I swear sometimes this game looks like some sort of fantasy Sound of Music:

 

1793505124_ELDENRING_20220311234450.thumb.png.fa04fb37c02e58f9bf7400e194649ee1.png

 

Also I especially love the way the ruined churches etc look in this game. I live near a place called Reculver towers, and it's just like something from Elden ring. The way they've built them into the topography is fantastic:

 

1261278059_ELDENRING_20220311234119.thumb.png.f00e97f845ae31ca204ca3bfee0f4f05.png

 

As you can see, I'm currently cosplaying as Errol Flynn, rapier and all (dat stun lock!) but earlier I had this spooky outfit on:

 

Spoiler

742134397_ELDENRING_20220311202103.thumb.png.82d92569a0154c7b21c5e44d51fdd7c1.png

 

But it was creeping me out so I took it off. 

 

Anyway, so many adventures to describe but it's another late one and I'm spent. I wish I played Elden Ring for a living like Limmy! 

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Mammoth Friday night session this evening. Lost count of the number of mini bosses I took out. I've wrapped up most of Liurnia now and am currently deep in Raya Lucaria which, almost impossibly, seems even more intricate and labyrinthine than Stormveil!

 

"Oh the things I've seen..."

 

Also, I took Patches at his word and decided to 

Spoiler

get eaten by the horrible Iron Maiden thing at the bottom of the Raya Lucaria water wheel, only to end up in...Volcano Manor! Big Iron Keep energy here.

 

I followed the path far enough to get to a fog door and, seeing as a point of grace was relatively nearby, decided to give a go...

 

Spoiler

Two iron maidens!

 

:lol:

 

From, you bastards.

 

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Aaah I forgot Patches gave me that info, and I forgot to go to the bottom of that lift section too!   I need to actually start keeping notes, I only did it the first evening I played, lol. 

 

I had an amazing session tonight too, think a few of us definitely mooching around the same places, though I'd cleared the academy before doing the exploring! 

 

Highlights were clearing the Manor at North West (those fucking hands), and finding my way up the very north east high cliffs (fuckin Mergo loft vibes). Oh and getting back to the very beginning of the game! :D revenge! 

 

Amazing scenes all round. How can anything else ever top this adventure? Unbelievably great game. 

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Just now, Davros sock drawer said:

I haven’t seen Patches since I beat him up at our first meeting. Where does he go after that? 

There's an island in the lakes you can find him chilling on with a grace point. Easily visible from the lakes telescope, is how I found him.. 

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God. The effort in the weapon moves that have gone into this. So many weapons and then they combo differently once duel wielded. In fact the animation is partly what makes this so good.

 

And whats the betting some sad'o (or sado) completes this with just their fist.....or the torch?

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3 hours ago, Doctor Shark said:

How was the high Dex build? 

 

Mine has served me well so far, the katanas are great, dual welding even better! Having the Uchi in the offhand and the Naga-whatever it's called as the main is like the dual katana weapon from DS3 and you can proc bleed on a lot of bosses and enemies. I'm also going to experiment with the twin pole type weapons as I believe they're new to the series. Definitely going to use big weapons next character thought probably with faith. 

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