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Elden Ring - chortlesome japes


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Headed to Stormveil last night after cleaning up at the well. Margit got very distracted by my Demi-human mob, so much in fact that he only took two goes. I had way more trouble down the well beforehand.

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Doing clean up before pushing forward in Mt of G.

 

I think I might have partnered with a serial killer in my attempts to do every NPC quest. Whoops.

 

The various "Hero's Grave" tombs can chuffin do one!

 

You can parry/counter magic!

 

Spoiler

 

(Ignore the lost health. I got this video example perfectly first time!)

 

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I hate Elden Ring now, sorry.

 

I spent the best part of my entire Saturday evening and then until 3am last night trying to beat

 

Spoiler

In a secret place. A nasty boss pair.

 

Spoiler

Of gargoyles.

 

I am raging. The cheap asshole cunts!

 

I tried everything, even broke my "no summon help" rule. Guess it's back to the rest of the world to level up :lol:. And in the game.

 

 

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2 hours ago, Len said:

I keep getting invaded regularly. Have I done something wrong or just been very bad? World tendencies?

 

Saying that, one player invaded and dropped a humongous dragon sword for me then left so not all that bad!

You can only be invaded if you are actively trying to summon people, so if you have used the Furlcalling Finger Remedy and it has the icon shown. Then you can be invaded.

 

There are also NPC invaders too

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Btw if you’re spending time underground use R3 to change map so you can warp up/down 


Don’t do what I did and keeping using lifts to go between maps

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53 minutes ago, Benny said:

I hate Elden Ring now, sorry.

 

I spent the best part of my entire Saturday evening and then until 3am last night trying to beat

 

  Hide contents

In a secret place. A nasty boss pair.

 

  Hide contents

Of gargoyles.

 

I am raging. The cheap asshole cunts!

 

I tried everything, even broke my "no summon help" rule. Guess it's back to the rest of the world to level up :lol:. And in the game.

 

 

 

I got them last night after about ten trys the wankers. A certain ash summon that will look familiar and good old magic eventually won out. Along with a lot of twatting with katanas.

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I just got trolled hard in the southernmost part of the map

 

Spoiler

In a catacombs I think called "the Impaler" catacombs

 

Spoiler

So like all the other catacombs in visuals so far, nothing out of the ordinary, then HOLY SHIT the whole floor rising! Into spikes! I'm just surprised they didn't make it an instant death. I nearly shat and then burst out laughing.

 

 

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Can I also just mention in a game where people might often want to pose their characters in locations to take screenshots, and where they are often covered in blood from the latest slaughter

 

Spoiler

That the game gives you bars of soap to clean yourself up a bit for the photo op :lol:

 

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26 minutes ago, Kayin Amoh said:

 

 

Excellent work! I dread to think how long it's taken you. I haven't even looked at the achievements yet. Are they like other From games in that you have to do multiple runs and get every single major weapon, sorcery, talisman, etc.?

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3 minutes ago, Jamie John said:

 

Excellent work! I dread to think how long it's taken you. I haven't even looked at the achievements yet. Are they like other From games in that you have to do multiple runs and get every single major weapon, sorcery, talisman, etc.?

 

Not quite that bad, but still a ton to do in order to get them. Fortunately lesser spells aren't an issue, you just need to get all the legendaries as far as trophies / achievements are concerned, and you don't need to do the old thing of getting both (or sometimes three) results from boss weapons. Those aren't counted.

 

However, there's still a ton to keep track of. I went in blind first playthrough until the end, at which point I saw everything I'd missed till then. Yikes.

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3 minutes ago, Kayin Amoh said:

 

Not quite that bad, but still a ton to do in order to get them. Fortunately lesser spells aren't an issue, you just need to get all the legendaries as far as trophies / achievements are concerned, and you don't need to do the old thing of getting both (or sometimes three) results from boss weapons. Those aren't counted.

 

However, there's still a ton to keep track of. I went in blind first playthrough until the end, at which point I saw everything I'd missed till then. Yikes.

 

So you've done two full play-throughs in just over two weeks?!

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Biased, as I’m a slow-poke, but don’t see how you can really do this world justice on a first play-through of under 100 hours. You’d miss so very much. I’m slowing down more as I go.

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21 minutes ago, Jamie John said:

 

Excellent work! I dread to think how long it's taken you. I haven't even looked at the achievements yet. Are they like other From games in that you have to do multiple runs and get every single major weapon, sorcery, talisman, etc.?

 

Everything can be done in one playthrough, including all 3 endings if you backup your save in the correct place

 

I should be done trophy wise with the PS5 version soon, only have 4 trophies left to get and 3 are the endings

 

Found and defeated dragonlord this morning, then spent some time getting the miners bells so I can buy all the smithing / somber stones I need to level up to +24 and +9 respectively

 

It takes 12 of each smithing stone to get to +24 apparently and 1 of each somber to +9

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For some reason on the online parts don't seem to work at all for me. I can't see any bloodstains or messages anywhere around the world, and I feel like I'm missing out on a big part of the experience. I'm on a Series X, ISP is Hyperoptic and connected by wifi. Any ideas why?

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