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Elden Ring - chortlesome japes


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On 08/03/2022 at 13:08, Timmo said:

Also, is anyone else fucked at the moment? Like get-your-holy-weapon-out-and-strike-me-down fucked?

 

Every night I plan to wrap up at midnight, only to do 'one more quick thing' again. And again. Before going to bed at 3:30am every night.

 

Tonight I will have the best night's sleep I've had in a month.

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8 hours ago, Girth Certificate said:

Edgelord of Blood down. I'm never coming back here, ever :lol: 

 

 

 

Is that Mohg? I hear you. The blood lake area outside his palace is the most evil area in the game.

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4 minutes ago, dug said:

 

Is that Mohg? I hear you. The blood lake area outside his palace is the most evil area in the game.

 

I just rode right past it, fuck that :lol:

 

Killed the

 

Spoiler

Invader, though. And hoovered up the items.

 

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24 minutes ago, Benny said:

 

I just rode right past it, fuck that :lol:

 

Killed the

 

  Hide contents

Invader, though. And hoovered up the items.

 

 

I have this compulsion with From games where the first time I reach a new area, I have to clear out all the enemies until it's empty. After like the tenth time I carefully made my way round taking out all the red dudes then got merked by one of those bird cunts, I finally decided it wasn't worth it. Fuck that fucking area :lol:

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I’ve also finished this now. I’ve been back and forth about the game as I’ve played it. I don’t think it’s perfect, the balancing is definitely off for me in some places, and from about half way through I was starting to tire of the open world aspect (not the exploring, but the catacombs, graves etc were starting to feel a bit pointless). For what it’s worth it only took me 75 hours - and I have seen and completed every major area and major boss (I checked a guide), and only didn’t do some caves and catacombs. 

 

Whilst I had some niggles, now I am done, I have spent the last few days at a loss of what to play (do?) next. I’ve decided there is only one answer  - Elden Ring, again, from the beginning. 
 

There are two reasons. Firstly, I suspect a lot of my minor issues will dissipate now I know how the game works - where smithing stones and rune farming locations are etc. I also totally ignored ashes of war and summoning spirits for half the game, and it became much much easier once I used them. 
 

More than that, it is that despite the annoyances when I look back I just cannot believe how much good stuff is in this one game. My brother and I still hold Ocarina as the pinnacle, because in large part of how many memorable things you encounter. You start by finding your sword and shield, then the Deku Tree, then Hyrule Field for the first time, then sneaking past the guards in Hyrule Castle, then seeing Ganondorf, then meeting Epona, then Darunia dancing and I am not even at Dodongo’s Cavern.

 

This game is similar - looking back on it there are so so many good bits, more than in any other souls game probably, it outweighs the minor criticism. I probably think bloodborne is overall the best From game, because I cannot think of any flaws beyond blood vials being a consumable (I don’t mind about the lack of build variety). But this is probably a close second tied with Dark Souls.

 

Anyway, back to Limgrave I go!

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I had to turn it off today bouncing off that Fire Giant even though I've nailed 70% of the fight. Every time I get killed I don't think it's my fault.   I shall have to take a break I think. 

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4 hours ago, Number 28 said:

Yeah, pretty much. Feels like pure luck to get out alive. The final moments without the mimic are pure panic stations. I needed about two more hits and was expecting it to pull some huge bullshit move out of the bag at any moment.

 

The point at 1:12 against

  Hide contents

Radagon is bullshit right? I was sure you could jump his stompy AOE moves.

 

 

That's the move that was making me rage, it's so big and unavoidable! Well done, it just becomes a dps race against both doesn't it? The longer you hang around the more chance some bullshit will kill you.

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I'm back for more! This time with a new build. And after 3 hours played i'm very happy with my DS2 Faaram Knight cosplay.

 

FPSSZ79XwAQQ5IX.thumb.jpg.bf6218f6a79d6ce76f906d63c7540544.jpg

 

Death's Poker+9, which has absurd damage this early, all thanks to ymfah and his 'break the game' series of Youtube videos which i admire and adore, especially when you just wanna have some OP fun on a Friday night.

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2 hours ago, 5R7 said:

the secret of the accord!

 

 

I have literally just met her and agreed to that. Not watching that just yet...

 

On the plus side, I now have a horse as a result, and have crafted some arrows after spending an evening beating up small, furry creatures.

 

I felt really bad about the large tortoise; it's not like he had much chance of getting away...

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You don't have to kill the tortoises, I didn't use the item you make from their neck once in my run through, my second character is not hurting any tortoise dudes. Peace to the tortoises!

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I'm getting there, had a lot of frustrations trying to get through the side-quests, I think that's one thing they could do better definitely. I know there's this idea of free-flowing storytelling but it feels pretty jank tbh but maybe that's just my experience.

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4 hours ago, smac said:

My experiences so far.

  • Meet skeletons in training dungeon. Die (only once, because I disabled m'shield and kept aiming my bow).
  • Meet bats outside. Die.
  • Meet wolves in cave. Die.
  • Meet Imps in dungeon. Die.
  • Meet guy in Santa hat selling stuff. Survive.
  • Get to castle pointed to by pixie dust supposedly guiding my way. Something large jumps on my head and squashes me to death...

I did manage to kill most of the zombie types and guards outside...

That's the hardest bit. 

 

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Nearly there now.

Did the 

Spoiler

Haligtree, and got to Godskin Duo

before calling it a night.

Spoiler

Crumbling Tornado Zone, as I like to call it, looks amazing - the outdoors lighting is really great.

Until tomorrow!

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9 hours ago, Parappa said:

That's the hardest bit. 

 

 

That's good to know. Like I said, I ran out of arrows early on, so I switched to farming small animals and birds to craft new bone arrows, and am picking up whatever I can to make runes so I can maybe start to level up/get more gear.

 

The small dungeon with the imps, pointed at by some long-necked dude's statue/blue glow seems do-able; I can get in so far, but end up over-healing and wasting potions by mistake by pressing the wrong button. So I don't have any red tears when I need 'em.

 

So mostly newbie errors.

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Finished and got all the achievements yesterday. For me I think the first 80% of this game is staggering. Like I genuinely don't know how a team can put so much creativity into a world and some moments are going to stick with me for a long time.

 

I think the final 20% was a comedown. The last three areas were a bit boring, one in particular felt just randomly placed. Also while some of the bosses are visually incredible when I was doing a tier list I actually found it hard to put any of them into the S tier in a way I immediately could with like Isshin or Artorias. 

 

Still though it's an incredible game and while I prefer how combat works in Sekiro it's still my favourite game Fromsoft have put out. 

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Only had a short go yesterday, realised I had missed a fairly large part of the first river section (teleport to get higher up), so was nice to find another boss and some nice items. 

Summon levelled up another two times, yay. 

 

Weirdly I upgraded my Int by 1 and my moonveil sword jumped up by about 90 damage, whereas previous levels in Dex or int barely moved the needle. I'll never fully understand this game. 

 

While I'm absolutely head over heals in love with this game I do find the way they handle NPCs needlessly vague. A page listing all the NPCs and the dialogue they've said would be enough, and it wouldn't break the ethos of the game. 

I also gave up reading item descriptions some time ago, the moment to moment gameplay is so much more interesting than the story, so I don't have a clue what's going on. 

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I'm honestly not sure what to do with myself today. What do you do when you love games but have just finished what might be the best you'll play for a decade?

 

... Start a new run I guess!

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It's honestly perhaps a bit too "big" for additional runs. I think the other From games suit this better, as your build will more directly affect progress due to the linearity.

 

But with this it's more like coming to the end of an epic novel or TV series and not knowing what to do with yourself.

 

I'm still dreaming about The Lands Between.

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