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Rate the last film you watched out of 5


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On 19/01/2022 at 18:29, Doctor Shark said:

A film tells a complete story. This does not. It’s half a film and half a story so it gets half score. 

 

I loved Lynch's Dune growing up and thought the missed plot int he second half was just the usual "couldn't fit all the stuff in the book onto the screen" - itis. But reading the book a few years ago.... nope, like that in the book too.

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8 hours ago, Mikes said:

 

I loved Lynch's Dune growing up and thought the missed plot int he second half was just the usual "couldn't fit all the stuff in the book onto the screen" - itis. But reading the book a few years ago.... nope, like that in the book too.


Yes, I think people forget so much of it at the end happens ‘off camera’. The hardiest tribal warriors in the galaxy fight the empire’s most savage and heartless forces to the bitter end. Imagine the destruction!

 

Well, you’re going to have to, because I didn’t write it.

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2 hours ago, ZOK said:


Yes, I think people forget so much of it at the end happens ‘off camera’. The hardiest tribal warriors in the galaxy fight the empire’s most savage and heartless forces to the bitter end. Imagine the destruction!

 

Well, you’re going to have to, because I didn’t write it.

 

Because it doesn't matter. What matters is the Emperor's surprise at the fait accompli, not a boring action scene.

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14 hours ago, Mikes said:

 

I loved Lynch's Dune growing up and thought the missed plot int he second half was just the usual "couldn't fit all the stuff in the book onto the screen" - itis. But reading the book a few years ago.... nope, like that in the book too.

 

The Lynch film's runtime is definitely unbalanced in favour of spending more time on the earlier events, making the second half feel comparatively rushed.

 

When I watched the 1984 version last year, I noticed that

Spoiler

Paul and Jessica overpowering their captors and sheltering in the tent

happens over halfway through the film. I checked the book, and that event happens about 40% of the way through the story (marking the split between Book 1 and Book 2).

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On 20/01/2022 at 13:27, ImmaculateClump said:

1.66666666667/5, Shirley?

 

If Doctor Shark isn't on the windup, I'll chew my own tits off.

 

I'm not on a windup. 

 

23 hours ago, barkbat said:

In a way, by giving half a film 2.5/5 you're basically saying its amazing. It's half a perfect score.

 

Well, yeah. If the second part is as engaging as the first it will likely be a close  to perfect story. As I said in my score (and the Dune thread) I liked what was there, there just wasn't enough of it.

 

12 hours ago, iknowgungfu said:

Shit - we all need to rescore a lot of Star Wars and Marvel movies now. 😉

 

My scoring method works for me, it doesn't have to make sense! :lol:

 

I guess what I'm getting at is that, more than any other film I can think of that was part of a larger/longer story, Dune just felt really incomplete.

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I hear you, they could have done more to make the ending feel satisfying.
I think it's half a film too, but for different reasons, though I enjoyed it well enough.

Check out the fan edit of the Lynch version. It feels like bloody Flash Gordon in comparison! It's fantastic.

 

 

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Blonde Fist (1991)

It's sad to see Margi Clarke coming off doing Making Out to this frankly forgettable film. Sloppily-directed by Margi's brother, Frank Clarke, it just feels baggy, doesn't hold together at all. There appeared to be parts that were aiming for social commentary but they were so poorly written they just didn't work - Ken Loach this ain't. At least there were a few moments where Margi got to do some satisfying gobbiness, she does the best she can with the material.

 

2/5

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From the sublime to the ridiculous 

 

Moon

 

An absolute treat of a movie. A truly mesmerising performance from Rockwell and an assured directing debut from Jones. It’s perfectly plotted and paced. It really doesn’t put a foot wrong and looks and feels like a refreshing bit of sci fi. It totally knows it’s budgetary constraints and we are presented with a believable environment. 
 

5/5


 

Mute

 

An absolute mess of a movie. Firstly, why is it set in the future? The entire plot doesn’t need it to be. Why is the central character Amish? Again there is no need for it, it serves no purpose. It took me two attempts to get through this turgid rubbish. The main guy is just an incredibly annoying character to hang a movie on. I just wanted to punch him repeatedly in the face for the entire movie and felt no empathy or sympathy for him at any point. The film is needlessly seedy. It was only Jones’s name on the credits that piqued my interest in seeing this and I wish I hadn’t bothered. Yet another shite Netflix movie. Why can’t they make decent stuff?

 

0/5

 

Right, Warcraft and Source Code shall be watched in the next few days to complete Jones’s filmography 

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23 minutes ago, sandman said:

From the sublime to the ridiculous 

 

Moon

 

An absolute treat of a movie. A truly mesmerising performance from Rockwell and an assured directing debut from Jones. It’s perfectly plotted and paced. It really doesn’t put a foot wrong and looks and feels like a refreshing bit of sci fi. It totally knows it’s budgetary constraints and we are presented with a believable environment. 
 

5/5


 

Mute

 

An absolute mess of a movie. Firstly, why is it set in the future? The entire plot doesn’t need it to be. Why is the central character Amish? Again there is no need for it, it serves no purpose. It took me two attempts to get through this turgid rubbish. The main guy is just an incredibly annoying character to hang a movie on. I just wanted to punch him repeatedly in the face for the entire movie and felt no empathy or sympathy for him at any point. The film is needlessly seedy. It was only Jones’s name on the credits that piqued my interest in seeing this and I wish I hadn’t bothered. Yet another shite Netflix movie. Why can’t they make decent stuff?

 

0/5

 

Right, Warcraft and Source Code shall be watched in the next few days to complete Jones’s filmography 

 

Which will nicely fill the missing gaps.

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Call Jane - 3/5 (screening)

 

Drama focused on a group of women in 70s Chicago that help other women undergo illegal abortions. A really good performance from Elizabeth Banks anchors the film, with Sigourney Weaver adding a bit of effortless class.

 

Feel the first half of is somewhat darker, the second half being more akin to The Help in that it deals with a very sensitive subject in a pretty broad way. Ending is a bit rushed, even at two hours would have happily spent more time in the ladies’ company.

 

Overall enjoyed it, and it’s a tragedy that a historical piece remains so damn pertinent.

 

(#55/1000)

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Timecrimes (2007)

 

An excellent low-budget time travel film that continues to surprise even when you think you know exactly how things are going to play, and is quite intense given the short period of time over which the film's events take place.

 

4/5

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Avatar

 

Yes, I know, it’s Ferngulley. And yes it’s tropes are somewhat questionable, but it’s still a ridiculously good looking, technically astounding spectacle some 13 years on. I still enjoy what it has to offer. Damn shame he’s wasting a decade or more of his directing life on four more of them though.

 

3.5/5

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The Nest - 2.5/5

 

Story about a rich family moving to London and everything falling apart.

 

Heard good things about this from critics but it left me flat. 

 

The acting is all top notch and I really like Jude Law, also it's wonderfully lit and shot. I was shocked how much I liked the direction, considering how I felt empty on the movie as a whole.

 

It also has this weird almost A24 horror tone to it (it's not a horror in any way)  that's tough to explain. A bit like Hereditary off the top of my head. 

 

I'm giving it a lot of praise, there's a lot to like, a hell of a lot. But it's just a bit dull at times. I enjoy a slow drama where lives can go down the toilet but I found the two main cast members so unlikeable that I didn't care. And the ending, or lack of one was poor. 

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19 hours ago, sandman said:

From the sublime to the ridiculous 

 

Moon

 

An absolute treat of a movie. A truly mesmerising performance from Rockwell and an assured directing debut from Jones. It’s perfectly plotted and paced. It really doesn’t put a foot wrong and looks and feels like a refreshing bit of sci fi. It totally knows it’s budgetary constraints and we are presented with a believable environment. 
 

5/5


 

Mute

 

An absolute mess of a movie. Firstly, why is it set in the future? The entire plot doesn’t need it to be. Why is the central character Amish? Again there is no need for it, it serves no purpose. It took me two attempts to get through this turgid rubbish. The main guy is just an incredibly annoying character to hang a movie on. I just wanted to punch him repeatedly in the face for the entire movie and felt no empathy or sympathy for him at any point. The film is needlessly seedy. It was only Jones’s name on the credits that piqued my interest in seeing this and I wish I hadn’t bothered. Yet another shite Netflix movie. Why can’t they make decent stuff?

 

0/5

 

Right, Warcraft and Source Code shall be watched in the next few days to complete Jones’s filmography 

 

Source Code is great. And I watched Warcraft on a lazy Sunday afternoon recently and thought it was ok. 

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1 hour ago, Ry said:

The Nest - 2.5/5

 

Story about a rich family moving to London and everything falling apart.

 

Heard good things about this from critics but it left me flat. 

 

The acting is all top notch and I really like Jude Law, also it's wonderfully lit and shot. I was shocked how much I liked the direction, considering how I felt empty on the movie as a whole.

 

It also has this weird almost A24 horror tone to it (it's not a horror in any way)  that's tough to explain. A bit like Hereditary off the top of my head. 

 

I'm giving it a lot of praise, there's a lot to like, a hell of a lot. But it's just a bit dull at times. I enjoy a slow drama where lives can go down the toilet but I found the two main cast members so unlikeable that I didn't care. And the ending, or lack of one was poor. 

 

Oh yeah, I saw that. I thought I'd downloaded this - https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/the_nest_2021

so I was waiting all the way through for it to kick off and go proper horrorshow :D So you can imagine, that ending was even more of a letdown!

 

When i saw Jude Law's face I was like "ah for f-... I didn't know this cunt was in it!" but I stuck with it, and I'm glad I did.

Like you say, it doesn't amount to much, but it's a fun little journey.

Jude Law was alright as he's playing a one note prick, he only has to convey complicated emotion at the end of the film and the director keeps the camera quite a distance from his face out of respect for the audience.

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Belfast 

 

I enjoyed watching this but didn’t really get into it. Kermode said you’d have to be a grinch to come out of this not beaming from ear to ear, yeah I must be a grinch. 
 

2.5/5

 

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18 hours ago, Talvalin said:

Timecrimes (2007)

 

An excellent low-budget time travel film that continues to surprise even when you think you know exactly how things are going to play, and is quite intense given the short period of time over which the film's events take place.

 

4/5


This has been on my list for a while. Where did you watch it? 

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Alien 3

 

I decided on a whim last night to watch this for the first time in over 20 years. The last time I'd seen it was sufficiently long ago that I could barely remember what happened.

 

Good Christ, this film is weird. It really feels like a completely unrelated film which Ripley and the alien have been clumsily shoehorned into. I'm semi convinced this is actually true. I reckon what happened was someone wrote a script about a monastery on a small Italian island in the 1910s, where a boat with a half drowned woman in it washes up one stormy night. The monks bring her in to recover despite women not being allowed to set foot on the island, but the presence of a woman in their community causes drama. Feelings are felt, conflicts are entered into, faiths are questioned. The emotional climax of the story is when the woman, upon finding she's pregnant (and unmarried, in a deeply catholic society), hurls herself off the cliff before young Brother Benedict, who had fallen hopelessly in love with her, can stop her. Brilliant. Pure Oscar bait.

 

Then some movie exec, absolutely off his fucking chuff on snort, reads it and goes "Yes! This is the new Alien movie!" and throws it at some poor schmuck to rewrite it.

 

So this weird melodramatic tone certainly makes the film interesting, but it unfortunately doesn't make it good. It doesn't work as an Alien film for me; I think it honestly would have been better if Ripley and the alien weren't in it. I would watch a film purely about the inmates of the prison, and the rivalry between Tywin Lannister and Richie & Eddie's neighbour.

 

It gains a point for its interestingness, and a point for Charles Dance being stern, but that's it.

 

2/5

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53 minutes ago, dug said:

Alien 3

 

I decided on a whim last night to watch this for the first time in over 20 years. The last time I'd seen it was sufficiently long ago that I could barely remember what happened.

 

Good Christ, this film is weird. It really feels like a completely unrelated film which Ripley and the alien have been clumsily shoehorned into. I'm semi convinced this is actually true. I reckon what happened was someone wrote a script about a monastery on a small Italian island in the 1910s, where a boat with a half drowned woman in it washes up one stormy night. The monks bring her in to recover despite women not being allowed to set foot on the island, but the presence of a woman in their community causes drama. Feelings are felt, conflicts are entered into, faiths are questioned. The emotional climax of the story is when the woman, upon finding she's pregnant (and unmarried, in a deeply catholic society), hurls herself off the cliff before young Brother Benedict, who had fallen hopelessly in love with her, can stop her. Brilliant. Pure Oscar bait.

 

Then some movie exec, absolutely off his fucking chuff on snort, reads it and goes "Yes! This is the new Alien movie!" and throws it at some poor schmuck to rewrite it.

 

So this weird melodramatic tone certainly makes the film interesting, but it unfortunately doesn't make it good. It doesn't work as an Alien film for me; I think it honestly would have been better if Ripley and the alien weren't in it. I would watch a film purely about the inmates of the prison, and the rivalry between Tywin Lannister and Richie & Eddie's neighbour.

 

It gains a point for its interestingness, and a point for Charles Dance being stern, but that's it.

 

2/5

 

Uh, the whole medieval monk thing - you do know the original Alien3 concept, right? The wooden planet? And the monks?

alien-3-wooden-planet.jpg

 

http://vincentwardfilms.com/project/concepts/alien-3/concept-drawings/gallery-i/

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Fight Club (1999) - 4/5

 

Meat Loaf inspired watch last night. Still an incredible film but a tougher watch these days. Perhaps it is to nihilism as Trainspotting is to heroin?

 

Raya And The Last Dragon (2021) - 3/5

 

Bit clumsy and uninspired but passable enough as a family film, I suppose.

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33 minutes ago, Festoon said:

 

Uh, the whole medieval monk thing - you do know the original Alien3 concept, right? The wooden planet? And the monks?

alien-3-wooden-planet.jpg

 

http://vincentwardfilms.com/project/concepts/alien-3/concept-drawings/gallery-i/

 

Yeah, I was vaguely aware of it but didn't really know any details. Didn't a version of the script from the wooden planet era surface a few years back? Or maybe I'm thinking of something else.

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