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Rate the last film you watched out of 5


Raoull duke
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No Time To Die - 1/5

 

Fucking hell, that was boring. Lifeless characters, utterly non-threatening personality vacuum of a villain, pedestrian action. I want my two hours back, frankly.

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4 minutes ago, Festoon said:

 

Let me guess, Apatow employing the whole family?


Yup, Leslie Mann. Who is usually funny to be fair. And his daughter, Iris who I can’t remember from her other cameos in his films but it’s probably telling she’s not in much else.

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War of the Worlds (Spielberg) - 4k Blu-Ray

 

Great visual effects but I'm still annoyed that they changed the time and the place from the book, especially when the ending is the same. I just can't see anyone doing Wells book properly (although it is a bit of a dry read, like a travelogue of places and names at times). 

 

The 4K version with Dolby Vision was one of the rare ones where I thought it was an upgrade to the washed out Blu-Ray versions

 

4/5

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Amelie (2001) - Ages since I first watched this and always had fond memories of it, partly as I was on a bit of a french movie binge at the time. 4/5

 

Arrietty (2010) - It's basically Ghibli Borrowers, which is excellent. I really enjoyed this, lovely soundtrack too. 4/5

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Coffee & Kareem - 1/5 (Netflix)

 

Thought The Bubble would be the worst ‘comedy’ I’d watch for a while but managed to find a worse one in less than 24 hours. Absolutely dire spin on the buddy cop genre, with barely veiled homophobia throughout.

 

(#236)

 

Might have to stick Spinal Tap on again just as a reminder films can be funny.

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The Bubble

 

Not finished it yet. It's still ongoing while I write this. The smuggest film I've ever seen. I can imagine Judd Apatow and the producers behind the camera patting themselves on the back after every shit joke about Hollywood.

 

1/5

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Robot Carnival (1987) - A Japanese animated anthology, focussed on robots. Weird one this, it doesn't have any link between segments in the way Heavy Metal does, and it has limited dialogue (some segments have it, others don't). Some of the segments are great, benefitting from the limitations. If you like any combination of robots, anime or even dystopian sci-fi I reckon you'll find something in here. 3/5

 

Timecrimes (2007) - Pretty sure it was recommended in here, a really nicely done time-travel-goes-wrong-horror-lite (maybe?). Just watch it, it's very good. 4/5

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Moonfall (2022)

 

Don't care if this knows it's stupid, it's fucking awful, with a terrible script, dialogue, plot & premise. The characters are paper thin and the CGI is utterly terrible.


The big exposition dumb that tells you what the Moon is, is frankly laughable. I bet Emmerich thought he was being really clever and deep with it. There are moments in this that make tge film 2012 look realistic.


I was hoping for enjoyable dumb fun but I just got dumb with a massive side order of utter shite.

 

1/5

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Don’t Breathe 2 - 1/5 (Sky Cinema)

 

The better half wanted to watch this so I’m blaming her.
 

Repetitive rehash of the original albeit with an ill-advised attempt at switching the villain to an anti-hero.

 

(#238)

 

Going to have to watch one of the higher-rated films on my various watchlists as this has been a pretty dismal week of viewing (The Map of Tiny Perfect Things excepted)

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Gladiator

 

Haven’t seen it for far too long. Hadn’t realised it was on Netflix. Still utter magic. Ridley might still make one last film this good, but not yet. Not yet.

5/5

 

 

Apollo 10 1/2


Really enjoyed it. Sweet story. Loads of lovely memberberries, if you’re of a certain vintage. Cracking soundtrack too.

4/5

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The Contractor (2022)

 

Quote

Involuntarily discharged from the Army, a special forces sergeant lands a contract with a private underground military force. When his very first assignment goes awry, the elite soldier finds himself hunted and on the run, caught in a dangerous conspiracy and fighting to stay alive long enough to get home and uncover the true motives of those who betrayed him.

 

The trailer for this, makes it look like a fairly engaging Bourne-lite, Jack Ryan-esque type action romp. 

 

It is none of those things. 

 

It's a hundred odd minutes of Chris Pine complaining about his bad knee. 

 

What little action is in there is well done, but not enough to distract from how dull and cliched the entire thing is. 

 

1/5

 

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Deep Water

 

Normally Affleck is a hard sell for me, but I was interested to see what Adrian Lyne was up to after all that time away from directing.

 

It is, as you'd expect, an observation of romantic and sexual tension that doesn't really delve deep enough into anything. Also, almost everyone in it is annoying and characters are written to behave almost nothing like actual humans.

 

Anyway, it's not a very good thriller. But if you're after this kind of thing, I suppose there are worse.

 

2/5

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1917

 

Great film this, some really stunning technical things going on here the average film viewer just doesn't register. The 4K Blu-Ray disc using Dolby Vision delivers just about the best picture and colour representation of anything I can care to remember, stunning. Misses out a half mark due to its over-scoring on the music front (again a plague of modern cinema)

 

4.5/5

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Do t know about you lot but I can feel the water works when watching a film at the drop of a hat these days. Something to do with kids I suspect. 
 

Almost she’s a tear watching Johnny do his song/dance towards the end of Sing 2 the other day. I really enjoyed Sing 2 despite everything about it should be cash cow by the numbers. 
 

It is definitely greater than the sum of its parts and I can’t help but love the infectious positivity of Buster Moon!  My kids love it and we have to have the soundtrack on at bedtimes all the time at the moment. 
4/5

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Death on the nile. 

 

Death of a franchise more like. Dull. 

It comes to something when Russel Brand is one of the better things in it.

The thing is, I love Agatha Christie, I grew up watching Miss Marpels and the Peter Ustinov films. This isn't a patch on them. The bulid up is too long and the third act too short.

The moustache origin story has no bearing on the story, other than something about love and a train.

The six months later in London at the end was pointless. 

 

2 out of 5 

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Enter the Dragon (1973) - Not a lot to say about this really, it's still the best kung-fu movie of all time (certainly one where kung-fu as an intrinsic part of the story) and just contains so many iconic shots, as well as that melody. I always like that it feels a bit more surreal than I expect it to as well. 5/5

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Nightmare Alley (Disney +)

 

A misstep from del Toro - it's just too long and fairly uninteresting as a result. It looks amazing, it has all of the visual traits he is famous for, just not a great overall film. It was crying out for a Tom Waits cameo really, but we got near enough with Ron Pelman instead

 

Watched this on Disney + and it's encoded with Dolby Vision - a quick check on the physical disc front confirms Disney are still doing their uttermost to destroy their own physical release platform by omitting DV again on the disc - despicable really

 

2/5

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7 hours ago, phresh said:

Enter the Dragon (1973) - Not a lot to say about this really, it's still the best kung-fu movie of all time (certainly one where kung-fu as an intrinsic part of the story) and just contains so many iconic shots, as well as that melody. I always like that it feels a bit more surreal than I expect it to as well. 5/5

Think I saw that when I was about 7 yrs old. Left an imprint on me forever more. 
 

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Knight Rider 2010 (1994)

The only similarity this TV movie has to the original TV series is a talking car and a guy righting wrongs. Even then the way this comes about bears no connection either. Instead this is set in what feels like a Mad Max-style post-apocalyptic future where LA is under a dome for some reason, and Michael Kni- er I mean the fella here is involved in some faintly cyberpunk nonsense that may have something to do with organ-farming but it's so poorly written it doesn't matter. Reading around, this was meant to be more of a straight sequel involving KITT but that was dropped. It does feel like a failed pilot as it takes ages to establish the world and the characters before spending the last 10 minutes wrapping the slight story up. Even the car is rubbish!

 

1/5

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On 01/04/2022 at 16:12, glb said:

The Bubble - 1/5 (Netflix)

 

A colossal waste of talent.

 

(#235)

 

I concur - and it never ends.  

 

When your intentially rubbish film within a film is better than the actual film then you have big problems.  

 

Plus it already feels insanely dated.

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