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Rate the last film you watched out of 5


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The Power of the Dog (2021)

The direction, cinematography, score and performances in this were all great, however the story and characters I cared very little for and the character development felt very rushed on all fronts.

3/5

 

Fantastic Beasts: The Secrets of Dumbledore (2022)

Remember when Dumbledore fought his equal in Voldermort at the Ministry and it was amazing, imaginative and looked great. Well how about we do that again, but instead take out all the good stuff and just have them fire laser bolts back and forth.

 

This film is the very definition of meh, it's just so flat. I don't really know what else to write about because apart from completely fucking with book lore, there's just nothing much else to say. We're two films into the whole Dumbledore/Grindelwald story now and nothing seems to have happened or moved forward.

 

I just don't know who this series is for exactly. It caters for neither the HP book or films lovers.

3/5

 

Firestarter (2022)

Boring, unimaginative remake of the Steven King novel. Just really really dull. Don't bother watching it, you'll get nothing from it.

1/5

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Uncharted - 2/5 (screener)

 

Not completely terrible (put that on the poster) but still baffling in terms of casting, even positioned as a prequel. Tom Holland basically played Drake as Peter Parker, when the role needed far more cocky charm. Had a look at who else was considered, and while Nathan Fillion would have been on the money, quite intrigued by what Zachary Levi would have been like after his hugely entertaining performance in Shazam.

 

Anyway, pretty middling as blockbusters go and not enough climbing for my liking. Weirdly the recent Tomb Raider reboot felt more like an Uncharted game than this.

 

(#368)

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Star Wars: The Force Awakens

 

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My third time watching this. I wanted to remind myself of the story before I watch episodes VIII and IX, the latter of which I still haven't seen.

 

I'm not a massive Star Wars fan, but this is a good blockbuster action movie. The set pieces are entertaining and it strikes the right balance between funny and serious. I will say, however, that even for a 2 hour and 20 minute film, it feels a bit rushed. The first act is paced well, but it turns up to 11 a bit too quickly after that and you're asked to suspend your disbelief a little too frequently.

 

Still, it's good fun if you don't think about it too much, and the performances are enjoyable. Williams' score (the best thing about the entire series) remains excellent.

 

3.5/5

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The Suicide Squad

 

Better than the Will Smith version but still not great.

 

Some silly bits and loads of gore and swearing. It just got a bit repetitive towards the end.

 

2 1/2 OTT character deaths / 5.

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16 hours ago, glb said:

Uncharted - 2/5 (screener)

 

Not completely terrible (put that on the poster) but still baffling in terms of casting, even positioned as a prequel. Tom Holland basically played Drake as Peter Parker, when the role needed far more cocky charm. Had a look at who else was considered, and while Nathan Fillion would have been on the money, quite intrigued by what Zachary Levi would have been like after his hugely entertaining performance in Shazam.

 

Anyway, pretty middling as blockbusters go and not enough climbing for my liking. Weirdly the recent Tomb Raider reboot felt more like an Uncharted game than this.

 

(#368)

 

I watched this earlier in the week and the highlight was 

Spoiler

when Nolan North had his cameo!

 

The rest was just a chemistry devoid mish-mash of bits from other, better films and the games.

 

3 "oh craps" / 5.

 

 

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32 minutes ago, teddymeow said:

 

I watched this earlier in the week and the highlight was 

  Reveal hidden contents

when Nolan North had his cameo!

 

The rest was just a chemistry devoid mish-mash of bits from other, better films and the games.

 

2 "oh craps" / 5.


Aye, that was a nice moment. Albeit,

 

Spoiler

Holland’s reaction to his mention of also falling out a plane came off as brattish instead of funny, it was almost like, ‘shut up grandad’. For me it underlined that he just wasn’t the right casting choice.


I do like Tom Holland as Peter Parker, but he still looks about 13. He should have played Drake in the film’s flashback.

 

And agree about the chemistry, Wahlberg came off as not giving any shits whatsoever.

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I think Wahlberg comes off poorly as he's a blank, a terrible actor.

 

Holland - hmm, I'm not sure fame is suiting him. He was on an Empire podcast recently and didn't come off well to me. Seemed like he had quite the ego.

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Star Wars: The Last Jedi

 

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This isn't that great, particularly after watching TFA the night before. Again, it starts off quite promisingly but then becomes too scattered. Characters aren't developed properly (who the hell was Benico Del Toro's playing?) before they're discarded. Entire sub-plots seem tacked on for the sake of it (like Finn and Rose's impromptu visit to Dubrovnik). And the film reaches a decent climax at the 1hr 50 mark before dragging on for another 40 minutes.

 

There are definitely some cool set pieces, like the bit on the salt flats pictured above, and the X-Wing battle at the start against the dreadnought, but poor pacing and plotting let it down. Everything just happens too quickly, over too short a length of time, and yet it still feels too long.

 

Anyway, Rise of Skywalker up next. I'm trying to go in with an open mind 😬

 

2.5/5

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Star Trek Into Darkness

 

I feel as a Star Trek fan that I'm expected to hate the Kelvin reboot trilogy - actually I think they're great, about as good and clever a reboot as the series could ask for and one that opens up Star Trek up to new audiences without invalidating what came before. Into Darkness is the weakest of the three but it's still hugely entertaining with an exceptional cast (apart from Simon Pegg, he's fucking dreadful) and it barrels along at quite a pace. If you stop and actually think about it, I'm not sure it really makes sense - if someone can explain the villain's actual motivation, I'd be grateful - but that's easy to miss first time through when you're caught up in the spectacle of it all. Honestly, I'd much rather watch this than Wrath of Khan.  3/5

 

Rise of the Planet of the Apes

 

All my apes are gone! This was great fun, with Andy Serkis putting in another stellar performance as Hollywood's most reliable monkey man. Effects mostly hold up very well and they make a convincing lead character out of a CGI chimp. If I had a criticism it's that the film flags slightly every time there aren't any apes on the screen - I wasn't at all invested in the plight of James Franco's sappy scientist - and while the final half-hour is exhilarating, it seems to take a long time to arrive at that point. But I genuinely enjoyed this and I'm really looking forward to watching the next one. 4/5

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The Lost City - This feels like a movie ten years past its sell by date, those 2010s comedies with an ensemble cast like Tropic Thunder where they're trying to be like a regular movie and focus on plot and character arcs and include some action and it's all kind of wasted by only having weak jokes. 2/5

 

The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent - This is kind of like the above too, but just generally more successful in that it made me laugh quite a bit. Falls apart a bit in the third act, but I do love the self-aware strain of humour that runs through the whole thing. 3.5/5

 

Ambulance - We're at a point where 90s directors like Bay and Emmerich are putting out films that rate terribly and do worse at the box office but on rllmuk there's loads of positive ratings from sad nostalgics. Don't listen to them. 1/5

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It’s movie length so I’m putting it in here. On Netflix at the moment. 
 

The Bleeding Edge

An absolute must watch. Eye opening. One of the many reasons why we should dread parts of our healthcare ending up in the US’s control. Fuck me. 
 

4/5 for wokeness

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Our Father

 

Interesting doc topic utterly destroyed for being portrayed by actors acting out transcripts as if the were the real participants.

 

Bafflingly poor decision.

 

0/5

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Shang Chi & The Legend of the Ten Rings

 

Never saw it at the cinema.

 

Absolutely brilliant! Up there with Black Panther for me in terms of "single character" MCU films.

 

My son enjoyed it too and I was impressed by his subtitle reading skills.

 

Fantastic cast, great action and fight scenes (the bus fight is brilliant and makes me want to watch Nobody again). Story was decent too.

 

Tony Leung has been one of my favourite actors since I first saw Infernal Affairs way back when so I was excited to see him in the MCU.

 

10 rings / 10 (so 5 /5).

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Morbius - 2.5/5

 

Not the trainwreck that some proclaimed. It's the typical superhero  origin crap. It's not good by any means though. 

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Epic Movie - 1/5 (Netflix)

 

Stuck this on while playing the Skywalker Saga. Not sure why but it’s a decision I made that I have to live with.

 

I find Hollywood’s short-lived trends fascinating, and the era of spoofing successful blockbusters but having more naked boobs than actual jokes is definitely one that deserved to disappear quicker than it arrived.

 

(#371)

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The Shining 

 

Looks superb on 4K Dolby Vision Blu-ray, the only downside is that it is now the enforced International cut, rather than the shorter UK edition which I think is a bit better.

 

5/5

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On 07/05/2022 at 11:21, ZOK said:

The Truffle Hunters - 5/5 (BBC iPlayer)

 

This Storyville documentary is indescribably good. It’s about truffle hunters and their dogs in Italy, and every shot is like a painting come to life. A fascinating cast of characters, both human and animal, make this an unmissable dig into a very particular style of rural life.

Another big up for this recommendation - I'm always living with huge dog want so this was perfect for a Sunday evening watch.

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Deep Water - 2/5. 

 

Disappointed. There was something brilliant in here. Dark, sinister tone, Very well directed and good performances from Affleck and (The absolutely stunning) De Armas. 

 

But it's so fucking ridiculous and unbelievable. I can't say too much without giving the plot away. I was just shouting at the screen half the time "get a divorce you twat!". Then again there wouldn't be a movie if he did the smart and logical thing. 

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It's a tale of two extremes:

 

This Is England (2006)

This is an important story about being caught up in rage and not fully understanding it, with a 13 year-old boy, whose father had died in the then recent Falklands war, initially finding friendship, but gets involved with a racist skinhead whose motivations become clearer. All this with the backdrop of Thatcher's continuing transformation of the UK for the worst. Apart from evocative video monages of current events and culture in 1983, Shane Meadows doesn't smash you in the face with the period setting, it doesn't feel like it was meant to be heavily nostalgic, the drama is informed by the time and kept in the foreground. Meadows has a knack for mixing humour with tragedy and nastiness, and it is especially effective in this. Praise also for what to me felt like the most convincing teenage romance on film between Shaun and Smell. Stephen Graham is scarily energetic performance as the racist skinhead Combo.

 

4/5

 

Freedom Strike (1998)

Ultra-generic military action that makes Navy SEALs look like a documentary. You'll only need two braincells to watch this: one to follow the blindingly obvious and predictable action, the other to keep it company. In essence the UN creates a team of operatives who can go in all guns blazing and sort out the bad guys, who in this case all happen to be Syrian. Cue Michael Dudikoff and a hopelessly miscast Tone Loc kicking arse, although Dudikoff does very little actual kicking in this, strangely. The team also features the stewardess from Windsor Airways flight 114 in Die Hard 2 (Felicity Waterman). It does feel like there was a trend for stock footage-laden straight-to-video fodder at the time, and whilst this admittedly has good pacing and pumping patriotic music, it's so generic, mind-numbing and lacking in character it's almost impossible to like.

 

1.5/5

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Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker

 

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I enjoyed this more than The Last Jedi but not as much as The Force Awakens. It's got some awesome imagery and starts better than it ends, but all of the fan service gets tiresome, and when they start wheeling out the ghosts to fill in the holes in the plot, you know you're in trouble.


I dunno. It's a weird one. I don't really understand why the diehards hate on it to the extent that they do (except that diehards always hate on everything by definition), but, despite having all the trappings of one, it never really *felt* like a Star Wars film, whatever that means. It was also very cheesy in places, and predictable, and juvenile, but then so were the original films, so there's not a huge difference there.

 

I'm undecided on it. The lightsaber battle in the waves was cool.

 

3/5

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McEnroe - 3/5 (screener)

 

Documentary about tennis’ ‘Superbrat’ John McEnroe. Does a decent job of shedding some light on McEnroe, but flips between quite serious to quirky in tone a little too frequently. Would like to have seen a mini-series rather than a 100-minute doc that skipped through a lot of moments that deserve a little more attention.

 

Its a Showtime production, not sure when it’s out but worth keeping a look out if you’re a fan of tennis/sports docs

 

(#375)

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Mystery Men

 

I haven't seen this for a long, long time so whilst I remembered the general story beats, I had forgotten the dialogue - and that made it a little treat watching it again last night.

 

Greg Kinnear plays a blinder, Geoffrey Rush is clearly having fun and William H. Macy is the wonderfully understated but provides the emotional heartbeat of the film. The ensemble cast have a nice chemistry and are carried along by the basic but light plot, rather than driving it forward with force of will - but it works. There are some simple laughs rather than full-on stomach-aching ones, but that's okay, because there's a warmth to proceedings which makes it feel like you're getting a gentle hug from the cast and it makes it a very easy watch that just breezes by.

 

4/5

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Hacksaw Ridge

 

A bit of a frustrating watch, this.

 

The (true) story is amazing, it's full of great acting performances, it's well shot and there's loads of fantastically visceral action sequences.

 

BUT it's also jam packed with eye roll worthy, horribly clichéd melodrama. I actually facepalmed a the scene where a character was sat in his tent, distraught at the loss of his men and the horrors of war, when a guy bursts in and shouts "hey, Cap! You gotta see dis!" and they dash off to see what's going on to the sound of stiring, hopeful music. Oh the tough guy finally opens up about why he's like he is? Dead in the next scene, then? Yep. Full of it. It even ends on a glorious, slow-mo, towards the camera heroic final charge.

 

It's still a good film, it just could have been great.

 

3/5

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11 hours ago, ScouserInExile said:

Hacksaw Ridge

 

A bit of a frustrating watch, this.

 

The (true) story is amazing, it's full of great acting performances, it's well shot and there's loads of fantastically visceral action sequences.

 

BUT it's also jam packed with eye roll worthy, horribly clichéd melodrama. I actually facepalmed a the scene where a character was sat in his tent, distraught at the loss of his men and the horrors of war, when a guy bursts in and shouts "hey, Cap! You gotta see dis!" and they dash off to see what's going on to the sound of stiring, hopeful music. Oh the tough guy finally opens up about why he's like he is? Dead in the next scene, then? Yep. Full of it. It even ends on a glorious, slow-mo, towards the camera heroic final charge.

 

It's still a good film, it just could have been great.

 

3/5


Felt the same to be honest. It practically lost me at the heroic Bible retrieval / rescue mission scene. 

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The Outfit 

 

Single location thriller about a Cutter (don't call him a tailor) trying to survive a night where the Chicago mob, who he sort of works for, try and figure out who the rat is in their operation. Great central performance from Marc Rylance holds the whole thing together. 

 

4/5.

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