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Rate the last film you watched out of 5


Raoull duke
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Dungeons and Dragons (2000) - I'd heard this was shit and yep it really is truly terrible, like worse-than-prequels level bad. It's not just Jeremy Irons chewing the scenery, it's most of the cast, when it's up to three people doing it in a single scene it's truly insufferable. I had to watch it in parts because the cringe was too painful. The CGI looks like a cutscene from a 1995 CD-ROM game and the physical props and scene dressing are somehow even worse, everyone is wearing spray painted plastic armour that even your average cosplayer would be embarrassed by. The maybe only good bit is where the comic relief gets graphically murdered and you're happy because he was so annoying. 0/5

 

It's a fucking miracle the LotR films managed to be as good as they were only a year later if this was the standard.

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Mortal Kombat (2021)

 

Thoroughly, ridiculously, stupidly entertaining!!

 

To me, the fights we're clear and easy to follow. The dialogue was cheesy. It focused on a few main characters rather than trying to cram boatloads in and fluffing it. 

 

The fact I didn't fall asleep during it is a major positive.

 

Bonus for getting Hiroyuki Sanada and Tadanobu Asano in the same film.

 

4 fatalities / 5.

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Avengers End Games (2019)

 

After finally getting through all the previous marvel films with my kids we got to this one, and....

 

6pz55d.jpg

 

On the plus side I finally get all of the memes.

 

2 CGI'd hours out of 5

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He’s talking about Nietzsche, his “Ubermench”, and how attaining something approximating godhood is inherently fascist, I mean, why help people when you can enslave them!?!

 

PUNY HUMANS! PAH!

 

all Also sprach Zarathustra, without reading Beyond Good and Evil…

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But End game isn't about attaining Godhood, its a fantasy film about stopping Thanos and fixing things. Thanos doesn't even want to rule the universe. 

Its as ultraistic as it gets. Unless you see everything around you as fascist and wanted everyone to just sit down and talk through their issues before finding common ground and a compromise.  Which would be dull.

 

But i guess if you don't like superhero's to begin with chances are, the MCU isn't really going to be for you. I'm not sure why you'd even hate watch it. But there you go, it takes all sorts. 

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4 minutes ago, Sidewaysbob said:

But End game isn't about attaining Godhood, its a fantasy film about stopping Thanos and fixing things. Thanos doesn't even want to rule the universe. 

Its as ultraistic as it gets. Unless you see everything around you as fascist and wanted everyone to just sit down and talk through their issues before finding common ground and a compromise.  Which would be dull.

 

But i guess if you don't like superhero's to begin with chances are, the MCU isn't really going to be for you. I'm not sure why you'd even hate watch it. But there you go, it takes all sorts. 

 

I think the fascist thing is just you need a guy with even bigger powers to stop the big powered guy. And hope they're nice to you.

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Elvis - 2022

 

Great performances by everyone, particualrly Elvis himself. Wonderfully shot and technically flawless. I was let down by the direction and the pacing was way off. I'd love to have heard more tracks as well, there were basically four or five songs that were repeated throughout then entire film. 

 

3/5

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The Black Phone - 2/5 (work screener)

 

Pretty underwhelming thriller, and certainly not a horror as I've had really nice bowls of ice-cream that were scarier. Ethan Hawke is decent in it, and there's something of an idea in there, but it all feels a bit clumsy and a bit flat.

 

(#593)

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10 hours ago, Mikes said:

You really need someone to explain to you the inherent fascist overtones of superheroes? 

 

Superheroes only have fascist overtones when they're doing might-makes-right messages, i.e the Nolan Batman films that just go "the police oppressing people is good actually", or anything by Zack Snyder.

 

Marvel largely doesn't do that because a foundational concept of their heroes is self-sacrifice, it's constantly emphasising what makes a hero is the values they have, not that they can punch good.

 

Avengers Endgame literally has them sacrifice themselves so they can save everyone and bring peoples loved ones back, it couldn't be further from fascism. But you know what they say about every political critique eventually getting co-opted by stupid people who just hollowly echo it without understanding the original intent.

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Day Shift

Netflix

Vampire hunters including Snoop Dog go on a gory adventure. It's incredibly stupid but also fun. It's very gory and I did a lot of "lol wuts" throughout but it wasn't bad.

2/5

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4 hours ago, RubberJohnny said:

 

Superheroes only have fascist overtones when they're doing might-makes-right messages, i.e the Nolan Batman films that just go "the police oppressing people is good actually", or anything by Zack Snyder.

 

Marvel largely doesn't do that because a foundational concept of their heroes is self-sacrifice, it's constantly emphasising what makes a hero is the values they have, not that they can punch good.

 

Avengers Endgame literally has them sacrifice themselves so they can save everyone and bring peoples loved ones back, it couldn't be further from fascism. But you know what they say about every political critique eventually getting co-opted by stupid people who just hollowly echo it without understanding the original intent.

 

I'll be honest that I don't really remember Endgame all that well (everything gets a bit hazy for me by the time the second phase or whatever it was called ends), but even outside of the issue of literal ubermensches wandering around, wasn't a recurring theme of the series that an [American-led, of course] team of said superheroes needed to be able to operate independently in order to protect the world from threats via extra-judicial violence, and indeed that any attempts to bring in government oversight were secretly attempts to undermine and corrupt said team?* You know; the supermen know best and will defend us from aliens, and we shouldn't get in their way. Definitely still feels a little lower-case fascism, even if it's not full Nolan Batman.

 

I may genuinely be misremembering here, but that was a primary takeaway I had of the series, which I by and large enjoyed nonetheless.

 

* I seem to recall the specific message of The Winter Soldier was "this team could be a perfect tool of fascism, but look, it isn't! Everything's fine"

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On 14/08/2022 at 19:01, mushashi said:

Aliens - Special Edition (1986/1991):

 

The James Cameron approved cut of this film is pretty great, some added backstory to give some motivation. For a 36 year old effects heavy film, it more than holds up. In terms of its reputation as an action film, it's kind of surprising how relatively little action there is in it and how few fucking marines they feel it's necessary to send on missions, LOL, not to mention how most of them bite it ASAP too.

 

4.5/5

 

Theatrical cut has the same action in it, but it's got less filler in-between scenes, so it moves along at a better pace, making it an action film. The SE cut turns it into a drama and adds nothing relevant, I never watch it as its too long and boring- all those bits cut out of it deserved to stay out really, but luckily both cuts still exist to consume today,

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5 hours ago, RubberJohnny said:

Superheroes only have fascist overtones when they're doing might-makes-right messages

 

And there's none of that in the Marvel films.

 

Lots of people really like the series and don't like the issues they skirt around being pointed out. That's fair enough, and there's no judgements on them for that, but superhero films where violence is the answer and only a few powerful individuals can save everyone is a fascist fantasy. 

 

This isn't something a feel strongly enough about to get into long convos about.

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37 minutes ago, Mikes said:

 

And there's none of that in the Marvel films.

 

Lots of people really like the series and don't like the issues they skirt around being pointed out. That's fair enough, and there's no judgements on them for that, but superhero films where violence is the answer and only a few powerful individuals can save everyone is a fascist fantasy. 

 

This isn't something a feel strongly enough about to get into long convos about.

 

Iron Man and Captain America disagree on this point in the second Avengers film and Civil War, right?

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1 hour ago, Wiper said:

 

I'll be honest that I don't really remember Endgame all that well (everything gets a bit hazy for me by the time the second phase or whatever it was called ends), but even outside of the issue of literal ubermensches wandering around, wasn't a recurring theme of the series that an [American-led, of course] team of said superheroes needed to be able to operate independently in order to protect the world from threats via extra-judicial violence, and indeed that any attempts to bring in government oversight were secretly attempts to undermine and corrupt said team?* You know; the supermen know best and will defend us from aliens, and we shouldn't get in their way. Definitely still feels a little lower-case fascism, even if it's not full Nolan Batman.

 

I may genuinely be misremembering here, but that was a primary takeaway I had of the series, which I by and large enjoyed nonetheless.

 

* I seem to recall the specific message of The Winter Soldier was "this team could be a perfect tool of fascism, but look, it isn't! Everything's fine"

 

I'm afraid you are misremembering, yes. In Avengers, the entire film is about protecting people and working with the existing power structure (the Police). Thor tries to talk Loki out of his warmongering several times. Captain America goes to Germany and actively prevents Loki acting like Hitler, literally covering civilians with his shield whilst the oppressor uses a spear. 

 

In Age of Ultron, the team do everything they can to save Space Serbia, and rescue thousands alongside the Police again. Tony is responsible for Ultron, trying to unilaterally decide what should be done for people (a suit of armour around the world) rather than actually fight side by side as an individual. 

 

In Civil War, the Space Serbia Accords are the first overtly fascist moves the 'good guys' make and guess who's at the centre of it? Yep, Iron Man again. He's a warmonger's son and believes taking power away from individuals (or a team) and handing that power to the state is the right idea. He's shown to be naive and wrong, both on a micro and macro level, and goes back to being a regular loner/Libertarian after finding out the state doesn't give two fucks about his ideas. 

 

Going right the way to Infinity War and End Game, we're so far beyond politics it's hardly worth discussion, but the Avengers aren't the aggressors in any of the conflicts. In fact, they are still trying to prevent war and human casualties despite the state (in the form of Thunderbolt Ross) wanting them all thrown in prison. Even the core of the 'time heist' is non-violent and the team are the ones subject to attack. 

 

I could go on but TL;DR the Avengers don't work on fascist principles. Except Tony who, in retrospect, is an extremely suspect libertarian arsehole :)

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1 hour ago, Wiper said:

 

I'll be honest that I don't really remember Endgame all that well (everything gets a bit hazy for me by the time the second phase or whatever it was called ends), but even outside of the issue of literal ubermensches wandering around, wasn't a recurring theme of the series that an [American-led, of course] team of said superheroes needed to be able to operate independently in order to protect the world from threats via extra-judicial violence, and indeed that any attempts to bring in government oversight were secretly attempts to undermine and corrupt said team?* You know; the supermen know best and will defend us from aliens, and we shouldn't get in their way. Definitely still feels a little lower-case fascism, even if it's not full Nolan Batman.

 

I may genuinely be misremembering here, but that was a primary takeaway I had of the series, which I by and large enjoyed nonetheless.

 

* I seem to recall the specific message of The Winter Soldier was "this team could be a perfect tool of fascism, but look, it isn't! Everything's fine"

 

The US government tried to Nuke NYC to stop the Aliens in the first Avengers, the superheroes put their lives on the line to protect it with one willing to sacrifice himself. Not sure how fascist that is. Should they have just let it happen? Isn't that even worse?

 

There's also a whole film based around the superheroes needing to be held accountable and in check.

 

At the end of the day Thanos decided to change everything without concent, some superheroes figured out how to put it right, they did, why would that be an issue? I don't see why we can't just have fun good vs evil films.

 

Next, Mikes will be telling us Luke Skywalker was a fascist because he used violence and was a powerful individual who used said power to save everyone. At what point do you draw the line?

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2 minutes ago, Treble said:

 

I'm afraid you are misremembering, yes. In Avengers, the entire film is about protecting people and working with the existing power structure (the Police). Thor tries to talk Loki out of his warmongering several times. Captain America goes to Germany and actively prevents Loki acting like Hitler, literally covering civilians with his shield whilst the oppressor uses a spear. 

 

In Age of Ultron, the team do everything they can to save Space Serbia, and rescue thousands alongside the Police again. Tony is responsible for Ultron, trying to unilaterally decide what should be done for people (a suit of armour around the world) rather than actually fight side by side as an individual. 

 

In Civil War, the Space Serbia Accords are the first overtly fascist moves the 'good guys' make and guess who's at the centre of it? Yep, Iron Man again. He's a warmonger's son and believes taking power away from individuals (or a team) and handing that power to the state is the right idea. He's shown to be naive and wrong, both on a micro and macro level, and goes back to being a regular loner/Libertarian after finding out the state doesn't give two fucks about his ideas. 

 

Going right the way to Infinity War and End Game, we're so far beyond politics it's hardly worth discussion, but the Avengers aren't the aggressors in any of the conflicts. In fact, they are still trying to prevent war and human casualties despite the state (in the form of Thunderbolt Ross) wanting them all thrown in prison. Even the core of the 'time heist' is non-violent and the team are the ones subject to attack. 

 

I could go on but TL;DR the Avengers don't work on fascist principles. Except Tony who, in retrospect, is an extremely suspect libertarian arsehole :)

 

Very well put.

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12 minutes ago, Stigweard said:

 

Next, Mikes will be telling us Luke Skywalker was a fascist because he used violence and was a powerful individual who used said power to save everyone. At what point do you draw the line?

 

Sub posting is passive aggressive, but if you want me to start on the deficiencies of the Jedi council in the star wars universe, sure. Not like they're not unknown.

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1 hour ago, Mikes said:

 

Sub posting is passive aggressive, but if you want me to start on the deficiencies of the Jedi council in the star wars universe, sure. Not like they're not unknown.

 

I mean that much is obvious but I didn't say Jedi council.

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11 hours ago, englishbob said:

 

Theatrical cut has the same action in it, but it's got less filler in-between scenes, so it moves along at a better pace, making it an action film. The SE cut turns it into a drama and adds nothing relevant, I never watch it as its too long and boring- all those bits cut out of it deserved to stay out really, but luckily both cuts still exist to consume today,


Yep, the bits we see on the colony at the start of the movie remove any tension from the plotting. The theatrical version is way better.

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