Hogwarts Legacy - Not as good as Dog Kid University

[Opinionated Ham Scarecrow]

Cognitive Disarmus 🪄

[Benny]

Wokeratus Repelus.

[b00dles]

Surely this one should be the defence against the dark arts class and the one about the game should be called quidditch.

 

in that It's also a pointless game that is similar to a lot of other things but also worse just with added wizard. ;P

 

Edit: I do actually like the idea of quidditch but the scoring and "game" of it is very, very silly. 

[jonathanhoey]

7 minutes ago, b00dles said:

Surely this one should be the defence against the dark arts class and the one about the game should be called quidditch.

 

in that It's also a pointless game that is similar to a lot of other things but also worse just with added wizard. 😜

 

Edit: I do actually like the idea of quidditch but the scoring and "game" of it is very, very silly. 

 

My favourite thing about Quidditch is not only that people play it in real life, but that they renamed it (to Quadball or something IIRC) in order to distance themselves from how repellent JKR has become. 

[Rex Grossman]

1 minute ago, jonathanhoey said:

 

My favourite thing about Quidditch is not only that people play it in real life, but that they renamed it (to Quadball or something IIRC) in order to distance themselves from how repellent JKR has become. 

 

Well that and the fact the word Quidditch is trademarked by Warner Bros and prevented the 'real world' sport organisers from using the word in commercial contexts.

[Strafe]

I’m not an expert in the exact rules of Quidditch but I recall that a large part of it involved flying in the air on a magical broomstick chasing a floating ball with wings. How the FUCK do people play it in real life?

[Rex Grossman]

Just now, Strafe said:

I’m not an expert in the exact rules of Quidditch but I recall that a large part of it involved flying in the air on a magical broomstick chasing a floating ball with wings. How the FUCK do people play it in real life?

 

They hold a stick between their legs and pretend they're flying. I think the rest of the game is the same. It's basically catch meets handball. But with a stick between your legs and you pretend you're flying.

[Strafe]

Just now, Rex Grossman said:

 

They hold a stick between their legs and pretend they're flying. I think the rest of the game is the same. It's basically catch meets handball. But with a stick between your legs and you pretend you're flying.

I can see that Warner Bros might have stopped them using the name for copyright reasons but we can’t rule out that even some soulless lawyers felt moved enough to use a cease and desist purely in order to stop people humiliating themselves.

[jonny_rat]

I don't envy the mods next week when they have to decide whether 'how do you play quidditch in real life' fits in the Hogwarts Legacy Discussion of Gameplay Mechanics, Appreciation and Technical Performance Only thread or the JKR IS A MASSIVE FUCKING TERF AND THAT IS INTENDED TO BE AN INSULT ACTUALLY thread

[gospvg]

Easy solution we just create a new thread to discuss

[PaB]

3 minutes ago, gospvg said:

Easy solution we just create a new thread to discuss

Surely people can handle talking about JKR and the game and all things related to it. The game isn’t out yet so naturally there isnt going to be much chat about it at the moment 

 

I mean you don’t really think a game exclusive thread would remain game exclusive, do you? 

[gospvg]

Spoiler

I was not serious

 

 

 

[thesnwmn]

1 hour ago, Rex Grossman said:

 

They hold a stick between their legs and pretend they're flying. I think the rest of the game is the same. It's basically catch meets handball. But with a stick between your legs and you pretend you're flying.

 

But also the balls don't have a mind of their own right? Right?

 

Is the Snitch a drone that some cunt flies around hiding?

[Rex Grossman]

9 minutes ago, thesnwmn said:

 

But also the balls don't have a mind of their own right? Right?

 

Is the Snitch a drone that some cunt flies around hiding?

 

I think the ref has a ball hanging from their shorts to represent the snitch. I know it sounds like I'm trying to make a joke but I believe this is actually the case.

[Rex Grossman]

On the subject of the name change, the organisers' hands were forced because as the sport continued to grow they had to either accept there could be no commercial opportunities because of the trademarked name or change the name and potentially lose the name recognition.

 

When they came out and said they were changing it because of JKR there was obviously a lot of cynicism. It's like if it turned out that Hogwarts Legacy was bricking consoles and you then cancelled your preorder saying it was for moral reasons there would be some people doubting your honesty.

 

However, quidditch/quadball was very progressive from day one, being very welcoming to NB and trans players. Rules were put in place so that teams could only have a maximum number of players who identified as the same gender to ensure teams were mixed in some way. I'm not sure I can think of any other contact sports (there is proper rugby-style tackling in some versions of the game - not all leagues have the same rules so I don't know how universal it is) where men and women are crashing into one another. Most organised mixed-gender sports are non contact, ie tag rugby, tennis, softball etc.

 

So YES they had to change it anyway but I've no doubt JKR's stance was a major issue for almost everyone involved in organising the sport.

[Mr. Gerbik]

1 hour ago, gospvg said:

Easy solution we just create a new thread to discuss

 

1 hour ago, PaB said:

Surely people can handle talking about JKR and the game and all things related to it. The game isn’t out yet so naturally there isnt going to be much chat about it at the moment 

 

I mean you don’t really think a game exclusive thread would remain game exclusive, do you? 

Let's do this right, people!

 

One thread for the game NO BOOK SPOILERS

 

A second thread for the game BOOK READERS SPOILER CENTRAL

 

A third thread for the game FUCK OFF JK YOU TERF

 

And a fourth thread for I BOUGHT IT SECOND HAND MY CONSCIENCE IS CLEAR 

 

[thesnwmn]

9 minutes ago, Rex Grossman said:

 

I think the ref has a ball hanging from their shorts to represent the snitch. I know it sounds like I'm trying to make a joke but I believe this is actually the case.

 

So one player per team is running around trying to grab the refs ball snitch for the entire game 🤣

[Flub]

9 minutes ago, Rex Grossman said:

 

I think the ref has a ball hanging from their shorts to represent the snitch. I know it sounds like I'm trying to make a joke but I believe this is actually the case.

 

So everyone runs around with a big stick between their legs chasing the ref and trying to grab their crotch? I may have had similar dreams.

[jonathanhoey]

 

It's a tennis ball, in a yellow sock, tucked into the back of the shorts of one of the umpires (who also dresses in yellow). 

 

Apparently there are 20 minutes of normal play first, where they try to score goals at 10 points apiece. Then the Snitch enters play (attached to the aforementioned official, whose job it is to prevent it being taken from them), and simultaneously each team subs in a Seeker. Play then continues until someone gets hold of the Snitch ball, whereupon they get 30* points and the game ends (if one team is ahead on points) or goes to extra time (if catching the Snitch brings the scores level). 

 

It does look like they've tried quite hard to make it a legit sport, at least as much so as ultimate frisbee or that kind of thing. 

 

It's a very long time since I read the books so I don't remember when Quidditch is supposed to have been invented (ie does it post-date the events of Hogwarts Legacy?)

 

 

 

*In the books wasn't it something daft like 250 points? Basically to guarantee Gryffindor a big W from behind. 

[Flub]

Play then continues until someone grabs that bloke's arse

[jonathanhoey]

1 minute ago, Flub said:

Play then continues until someone grabs that bloke's arse

 

Come on, take it seriously. 

 

Play continues until someone grabs the thing dangling from that bloke's arse.

[Flub]

1 minute ago, jonathanhoey said:

 

Come on, take it seriously. 

 

Play continues until someone grabs the thing dangling from that bloke's arse.

 

I can see why people play it.

[jonathanhoey]

Anyway the publisher's FAQ says no Quidditch: 

 

 

 

[thesnwmn]

Maybe EA bought the rights to Quidditch in games to replace the FIFA licence.

[Rex Grossman]

Is this trailer new? 

 

[thesnwmn]

Professor Weasley!!!?

[PaB]

Hogwarts legacy

 

project budget:

 

Coding : £10,000,000.00

Graphics :£10,000,000.00

Sound : £5,000,000.00

Marketing: £5,000,000.00

voice over artists: £5.76 

[MK-1601]

If they wanted two threads dedicated to the game they should've licensed something else.

[mikeyl]

Need another thread where we can’t talk about how Harry Potter is a cunt and the entire IP is filled with racist caricatures 

[TomatoConvenienceStore]

8 hours ago, gospvg said:

Easy solution we just create a new thread to discuss

 

No, Discus is a separate sporting event, we're talking about Quidditch.

 

7 hours ago, thesnwmn said:

 

But also the balls don't have a mind of their own right? Right?

 

 

 

With the Stick resting against them they mostly just stay where they are.