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The Man Utd Thread


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I think it might be a difficult few weeks for us, yeah. We've got a small squad, are in four competitions, and have a lot of injuries. We knew we weren't going to be the finished article this season, so even if we wobble we shouldn't start to panic. 

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Honestly think if Fred was approached on a football field by a man holding two guns and told to score a goal to save his life he'd prefer to ask to be handed a gun so he could shoot himself and die with some dignity. Watching him strike the ball and it bobble like he's hit a balloon is so predictably infuriating I'd rather he never played for United again because as long as he's on the pitch there's always that agonising possibility the ball falls to him on the edge of the box rather than any other player you'd rather it fall to, literally anyone, anyone at all, an opposition player even. 


Honestly can't fucking believe how shit he is at shooting and also how maddening it is. Strike through the ball, don't lean back, hit low and hard and don't aim too much, that's it, it's not that hard. 'well actually you appear to be complaining about his silly miskick that was actually a difficult shot tbf', I don't fucking care.


New manager bounce power is so strong literally anyone can manage a team before the first game, it seems. I honestly think they should just bring in the club chef or any cleaner and ask them to say a few words which then all the players process as some almighty rousing speech and they go out there like possessed demented gladiators. They're not even in the relegation zone! selfish cunts. just turn up, roll over, goddamit


True to my selfishness, I'm only really pissed because I put loads of accumulators on and the very first game, the first fucking game and United can't beat fucking Leeds at home. I also have powers, anything I want to happen...doesn't happen. sorry everyone. 


but I'm glad Sancho got a goal and that it was the lamest shot ever and still the keeper couldn't save it should give him confidence things might just go for him now. and also I have gnonto in my fantasy football team.


I suppose the chasing 4th but always dropping points at the exact moment the team needs to win them which they were doing a few years ago has been upgraded to chasing a title challenge and always dropping points at the exact moment the team needs to win them. Watch spurs fluke their way in though.im gonna stop posting it brings out the worst in me

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Tough game. Leeds are just kicking us all over the pitch. Malacia is getting wound up. Bruno has been ineffective. Weghorst moves in slow motion. They're doubling up on Rashford and Sancho because they know we don't really have anyone else to create anything. Our midfield has been awful. Someone is definitely going to get sent off.


The important thing is to come out ready after half time, not half asleep like last week.

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