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Cosmetic Surgery Live

Graham S

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My wife has just shown me a bit of "Cosmetic Surgery Live". In this section of the program viewers send in, via mobile, photos of their "problem areas", and the cosmetic surgeon gives some impromptu advice about the best course of action.

Except they don't seem to vet the pictures very well, so most of the pictures appear to be of perfectly healthy cocks. The surgeon just says, "Err... well I don't see much wrong with that one", and moves on quickly. Some woman was complaining of some problem with her genitalia, the surgeon mentioned some sort of prolapse, but the photo was blatantly some bloke doing a "dick trick" and making his cock and balls look like an unhealthy fanny. There was also a fairly nasty genuine picture of a prolapsed womb, with bits hanging out of her when she stood up, which made the surgeon look all serious and tell her to go to hospital straight away, as it was much more than just a cosmetic problem

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I watched the programme after TV's Most Embarrassing Moments, or something. I had to keep switching between it and The Sopranos to ensure I didn't miss the operation where the woman 'becase a virgin' again. Quite entertaining for a Five production. It manages to be both grotesque and arousing (I'm a sicko), depending on what operation you're watching. It doesn't help when Venessa Feltz starts going on about what she'd like to have done to her bucket cunt, though.

Having watched TV's Most Embarrassing Moments (or something...), if I were one of the women on that Cosmetic Surgery show, my most embarrassing TV moment would be laying on a table, legs akimbo, with my loose fanny on show for a bunch of teens to wank over.

It beats Nip/Tuck hands down, that's for sure. Tonight we get to see a sex change.

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on the subject of vaginas like badly packed kebabs.. I just got back from a friends birthday piss up.. he told his girlfriend (in strictest confidence) of an experience of screwing a 40 something woman while watching halloween, and saying it was like "shagging a bag of raw beef"..

much to his horror, his college mates since childhood presented him with a brown paper back full of pastrami with a VHS tape of halloween wedged inside...

the look on his face was utterly priceless..

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